


All the Things You Said

by Lara Winner (rah10381)



Category: Miraculous Ladybug
Genre: Adrien Needs Love Too, Clueless in Paris, Dorks in Love, Marinette Is Not Always Right, Plagg Is Awesome, Teen Angst Marinette, Tikki Is Right, adorkable Adrien
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-07-01
Updated: 2017-08-20
Packaged: 2018-11-21 19:12:06
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 5
Words: 29,068
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11363811
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/rah10381/pseuds/Lara%20Winner
Summary: Despite his fake-it-till-you-make-it approach, Adrien was rather clueless when it came to reading people. So when the axis on which his new-found social life is built upon decides to shift damn near upside down, he didn't see it coming. In retrospect, he should have seen it a mile away. He also shouldn't have counted on luck he didn't have. (Rated for Language)





	1. In which Plagg gives love advice and two adorkable teens decide to not-date

 

Adrien would be the first to admit that sometimes his understanding of social interaction was a bit lacking.

Blame could be placed upon his father, that years of imposed isolation from his peers put him at a distinct disadvantage when dealing with the nuances of hormonal teenage interaction. He could even concede that anime and comic books were hardly a good basis of comparison for navigating the pitfalls of the savage jungle also known as high school.

Observation could not always substitute experience; he'd been learning that the hard way.

It was Friday afternoon; the bell had just signaled the end of the school day and Adrien had to stifle a laugh as Nino was practically pulled out of his seat by his pushy girlfriend. Alya winked and flashed Adrien a fearsome grin, the kind that made him feel like he was missing something important. Not at all sure what that was about- because this was Alya and not many people could keep up with her thought process- he waved to his two friends and started putting his books away as the rest of the class boisterously exited the room.

A shadow fell over his desk and Adrien looked up.

"Hey Marinette," he grinned easily, genuinely happy she stopped to talk to him. It seemed she'd been making more of an effort lately to acknowledge him, sometimes without her usual unease, and it warmed Adrien's heart to think that maybe they were finally heading into that normal-friend-thing she had with Nino.

"H-h-hey A-Adrien…"

He tried not to show his disappointment because she was nervous around him again, and focused on the fact that she had talked to him first this time.

"This week was killer but at least it's the weekend, huh?"

Marinette blinked and then nodded with enough enthusiasm to make a bobble head jealous. "Y-yeah, go weekend!" she exclaimed softly, awkwardly fist pumping the air.

Adrien had to bite the inside of his cheek to keep from laughing. He didn't want to seem rude but honestly she was just too damn adorable. He decided to take pity on her.

"So…" he said leadingly, "I take it there's a reason you wanted to talk to me?"

Marinette slowly blinked again- the random thought filling his mind that her eyes were like a deep sea of blue he could drown in- before visibly collecting herself and promptly flushing scarlet.

"Right, um… here," she stammered, thrusting the non-descript white box she was holding into his hands. "I know you like pastries and Papa was trying out new recipes so I thought you could taste them and let me know what you think because I liked them but Maman said the raspberry was too sweet and the lemon wasn't sweet enough but if you don't want to try them that's okay-"

Marinette's rambling halted as she drew a breath and Adrien clutched the box closer just in case she tried to take it back. The delicious scent wafting up from the box made his mouth water.

"I can't wait to try them," he replied excitedly, "Thanks Marinette!"

She released her breath in a gentle woosh, a far more natural smile lighting up her face. "Really? Your welcome? I mean… your welcome."

A feeling of fondness pooled in his chest and Adrien couldn't help but chuckle. He truly liked Marinette and she was definitely one of his favorite people, but he was still completely at a loss as to why she couldn't just talk to him like she did with everyone else. He wasn't sure what more he could do to get her to relax.

But maybe he had an idea…

Slinging his book bag over his shoulder, Adrien motioned his head toward the door to get Marinette to follow him. The car was already waiting for him, he was certain, but his bodyguard could wait a little longer. He paused by one of the benches in the courtyard, hoping she felt a little more comfortable now that they were around other students, and hefted the box in is hand, "Want to share them with me?"

It was an innocent question so Adrien was more than a little confused when Marinette's eyes widened, dropping down the box like it was a nest of writhing vipers, and squeaked, "Can't… uh… I gotta… see. Go you later!"

Adrien watched her leave, stumbling over her own feet in her haste to beat a quick retreat, and let his shoulders slump in defeat. Maybe there wasn't anything he could do to get her to like him more. But if she didn't like him very much then why did she force herself to be nice to him and give him sweet treats?

Marinette obviously valued his opinion which should mean they were friends… right?

Why did he have this sinking feeling that he was missing something in all of this, something really, really big?

Why did girls have to be so freakin' complicated?

Clutching the box to his chest, Adrien made his way to the waiting car bemused and frustrated. At least he had the sweets. He understood those.

 

* * *

 

 

"So girl, how did it go?"

Marinette pulled a face at Alya's image staring back at her from her computer monitor. "What part do you want to know about? The part where I turned into a basket case suffering from verbal dyslexia or the part where he almost opened the box and found my love letter and I ran like hell?"

"At least you remembered to put the letter in there," Alya laughed, but then stopped abruptly arching a brow accusingly, "You did, right?"

Marinette groaned, clutching at her pigtails dramatically. "Yes I put it in there. I even signed it this time but I gave him the box so I'm pretty sure he would have known it was from me anyway." Taking a deep breath, she asked worriedly, "Now what do I do?"

"You wait. Give Adrien time to think about how he feels and if the boy is smart then he already knows how amazing you are and this should be a piece of cake," Alya beamed.

"But I'm not amazing, I'm…" she gestured wildly to herself, frowning, "just me."

"I'm calling bullshit on that. You. Are. Amazing. You just have to believe it, girl."

"What if he doesn't feel the same? Or can't? Then what do I do?" Marinette whispered.

"Then you hold your head high, be his friend and move onto bigger and better things. He's just a boy, sweetie. Paris is full of them." Alya replied with a cheeky grin.

From her unseen perch on top of the monitor Tikki nodded her head in agreement.

 

* * *

 

 

The letter was shaking.

No not the letter, Adrien realized; it was his hand that was shaking.

He could feel his blood pressure rising, heat flooding his face as his temples throbbed. His stomach was twisting into a knot, though from panic or excitement he really couldn't tell, well maybe it was a bit of both, but definitely more panic.

He still couldn't tear his eyes way from the letter.

What the hell was he supposed to do? This.. this complicated things, right? Because now he knew, now he had the answer to the mystery that was Marinette Dupain-Cheng. And it all made sense, in a scary, heavy- this is not something to be taken lightly because I could break her heart and she'll hate me forever but I've never thought of her like that- kind of way.

Taking a deep breath Adrien read the letter again.

_Adrien,_

_There is something I've wanted to tell you for a long time. I'm not good with words and when I try and talk to you and I make a fool of myself more often than not so I decided to write it down instead._

_You're an amazing, handsome and extremely talented guy. But more importantly you are the kindest, most caring person I know. You stole my heart the day you gave me your umbrella. But that's ok. It's yours if want it._

_I love you._

_There, now I can't take it back or completely mess it up by being scared. You mean the world to me and now you know it. I hope it's a good thing._

_All my love,_

_Marinette_

Why did she have to go and say anything? Why? Why? Why? He was perfectly happy being a clueless idiot.

"I told you she was your girlfriend," Plagg teased, the little kwami reading the note over Adrien's shoulder.

Girlfriend…

"Gah!" Adrien cried, dropping the note and lurching off the sofa to his feet. Raking his hands through his hair in agitation, he began to pace back and forth. "She… I… why…" He struggled to articulate his thoughts until he finally settled on something tangible.

"I love Ladybug, not Marinette," he stated sadly.

Plagg cocked his head to the side curiously. "So that's the end of it then?"

Adrien eyed the cat-like kwami as he floated past his head, his pacing coming to a halt, "Well yeah. I'm going to lose Marinette as a friend when I tell her I don't feel the same and as much as that really, really sucks I don't know what else I can do. I mean, I'm not going to lie to her just to spare her feelings. That would hurt her a thousand times worse."

Now Plagg was looking at him like he was the dumbest person on the planet.

"What?"

"Ok kid, pay attention and try to keep up," the kwami groused, rubbing his little paws together, "You're going to turn down a chance with a really nice girl who has genuine feelings for you because you think you're in love with some nameless chick in skin-tight polka dots? Reality check, what you've fallen for is the skin-tight polka dots."

"Not true!" Adrien glared, his sea green eyes flashing angrily. "Ladybug is everything I could ever want. She's brave, kind, smart, strong-"

"With midnight hair and blue-bell eyes, just like Marinette. Obviously you have a type," Plagg retorted with a roll of his glowing eyes and a fanged grin. "But your little girlfriend has something that Ladybug doesn't."

"She's not my girlfriend-"

"Neither is Ladybug," Plagg snapped, "Focus Adrien, this is the important part. Marinette loves you. Not because you're a model, not because you're a hero and not because I make you look good in black leather. She loves you, kid, and I've been around long enough to know that's something you don't just throw away."

Making a noise that sounded suspiciously like a whine, Adrien flopped down on the sofa and dropped his head into his hands. Damn Plagg for making such good points and damn his own lack of experience so that he couldn't refute the kwami's insinuations with certainty.

Swallowing back his irritation, he looked up at Plagg with a resigned sigh, "So what do I do?"

"That is up to you. I want cheese."

"Seriously?" Adrien hissed, his annoyance coming back full force. "After all of that now you've got nothing to say?"

"Pretty much," Plagg replied with a shrug. "I can't do all the thinking for you, even if I am the brains of this operation."

"Brains my ass," Adrien muttered under his breath.

"I heard that."

Ignoring Plagg, Adrien picked up the discarded note once more, revisiting the heartfelt words and this time allowing their warmth to sink in.

"I don't want to hurt her," he admitted softly.

Curling up on Adrien's thigh with his wedge of camembert, Plagg offered his charge one more pearl of wisdom. "Then don't."

 

* * *

 

 

Who knew that akuma attacks were a great way to expend copious amounts of nervous energy?

After a night of fitful tossing and turning and spending most of the day unable to focus on anything productive while nervously pacing a rut in her bedroom floor, Marinette was a tightly wound ball of frayed nerves. It didn't help that her thoughts kept running in circles, flipping back and forth between fantasies of Adrien taking her in his arms and professing his undying love to worst case scenarios where he gave her pitying looks and said thanks but no thanks.

When the akuma attacked it was a blessed relief.

Ladybug didn't have time to be hung up over some handsome boy. She couldn't afford to be distracted by sun kissed hair and polished jade eyes. Running over roof tops, adrenalin igniting in her blood, she held the fate of Paris in the palm of her hand. There was no room for uncertainty and self-doubt with such a precious treasure under her protection.

With her poker face on and her head in the game, Ladybug made quick work of kicking akuma butt and giving Hawkmoth the metaphorical finger yet again.

After she saved her partner's scrawny hide, of course.

They both collapsed onto the rooftop as swirls of ladybugs flew into the air in mesmerizing spirals putting everything back in its place. Catching her breath, Ladybug ignored the beep of her earrings and turned to watch Chat as he struggled to sit upright, his breath coming in wheezing gasps. He took a pretty hard hit against the side of the building, hard enough that some ribs should have been broken, but as her miraculous did it's work he started breathing easier and her worry turned to vexation.

"What the hell was that?" She asked with enough attitude lacing her voice to let him know she wasn't happy.

"Sorry my Lady, I made a bad call."

"A bad call? You almost got yourself killed," she snapped.

Instead of flashing Ladybug a charming smirk and teasing her for her concern, behavior that she'd come to expect from her partner, instead Chat simply hugged his knees to his chest and rested his chin on them refusing to look in her direction.

"I said I'm sorry," he mumbled softly.

Siting up as well, Ladybug folded her legs and braced her elbows on her knees, propping her chin on her fists. She didn't have much time so she got right to the point. "Start talking."

"Huh?"

"You've been completely distracted tonight," she replied by way of explanation, "Whatever the reason is you can tell me."

Chat opened his mouth to speak then closed and opened it twice more before finally deciding to ask, "Have you ever been in love, my Lady?"

Ladybug stiffened, not sure where this was going or if she would like the direction. Hesitantly she answered, "Yes, there is someone I love. Very, very much."

Another beep sounded in her ear.

Chat's eyes finally slid to meet hers, his expression unreadable. "He's very lucky."

"Of course he is," she quipped with false bravado to hide the vulnerability Chat's honesty threatened to reveal. "And you're lucky I'm here to save your neck."

"That I am," he smiled, familiar but wrong.

"Well if you're not going to tell me what's bothering you then I need to bounce before I turn back into a real girl," she said, rising lithely to her feet and pulling out her yo-yo. She was nearly to the edge of the roof when his hand grasped hers, stopping her in her tracks.

"This guy that you… you love, does he know about this?"

"About Ladybug?" she asked, looking back over her shoulder with a perplexed frown.

Chat Noir nodded, lips thinned and jaw tight.

"No and he won't, ever." Giving Chat's hand a squeeze, she continued sadly, "That's the price we pay for the freedom. It comes with responsibility and dangerous consequences. It's a good thing we have each other because no one else can know this side of us. That's the only way to keep the people we love safe."

Her earrings beeped again.

Chat's eyes flicked to her ear then back to her own, his expression resigned but determined.

"I get it, bugaboo. Even if we wanted…" he trailed off, giving his head a slight shake. "You'd better go. Until next time," he smirked, bringing her hand up to meet his lips.

"Stay out of trouble Kitty," she smirked back, flicking him on the nose before launching herself into the air and away from trouble with a capital C.

 

* * *

 

 

It was one thing for Chat to suspect that Ladybug might never return his feelings, but to have it confirmed from the source herself, that she did indeed have a lover, hurt worse than he was prepared for.

_There is someone I love. Very, very much._

Her soft words repeated themselves over and over, ricocheting around in his head, causing the breath to catch in his chest as he raced across the nigh skyline. He was fairly certain that a jagged blade going through his heart would probably be less painful than trying to breathe around the knot of frustrated tears lodged in his throat. But he refused to slow down, running as if his life depended on the slap of his feet hitting the concrete and the jolts that reverberated through his bones.

It was the beeping of Adrien’s ring that finally forced the distraught teen to seek the refuge of his unwelcoming home, collapsing exhaustedly on his bedroom floor mere seconds before his transformation dispersed, as a few traitorous tears escaped the corner of his eyes.

Plagg landed beside him with a tiny thump. "Are ya trying to kill me, kid?"

Feeling detached and drained, Adrien ignored the mischievous kwami’s baiting because now that the numbness had settled in he was too afraid to disturb it.

With robotic movements and a vacant stare, he sought the comfort of a hot shower. The scalding water acted as a balm for his screaming muscles and a convenient disguise for the tears that leaked down his cheeks. Resting his brow against the cooler tiles, eyes screwed closed against the memory of Ladybug's tender smile as she mentioned the boy she loved; he was consumed by self- recriminations.

That was his moment. He could have countered her feelings with his own. He could have laid out everything between them, strained partnership and consequences be damned. That was his chance to make her understand that is feelings for her were true, not just a silly, star-struck crush.

But he let the perfectly good opportunity slip away because underneath his over confident mask he was just a lonely boy with a loving heart that understood Ladybug wasn't his and never had been.

It was that simple truth that consumed him long after the hot water had run cold and he was curled up in a ball in his bed, kaleidoscope dreams of vanishing ladybugs, fields of blue-bells and midnight skies keeping him company.

The next morning when Adrien awoke, groggy from a restless night’s sleep with sandpaper eyes and a cardboard throat, the pale morning light that illuminated his room also elucidated a new perspective.

He would always love Ladybug. That wasn't something he could change, even if he were inclined to try. But why couldn't he come to love someone else as well? It was hardly fair to pine away for a girl who already loved another; a girl that would never be anything more than an ideal, just a part-time companion in fleeting moments of his life. Because Ladybug had been right about one thing, their alter-egos and the bond they shared only existed in the realm of their duty, not in their civilian lives.

Chat Noir was only a part of Adrien personality just as Ladybug was only a part of the girl under her mask.

A girl that Adrien Agreste would never get the chance to know.

It was a harsh truth to accept but one that Adrien would not shy away from. While he was optimistic to a fault, romantic by nature and cursed with a sentimental heart, he was also a practical person that knew when a situation was out of his hands.

How could Ladybug and Chat Noir have any kind of relationship if they could never truly be themselves when it counted most?

They couldn't.

But Adrien could be himself with Marinette.

He could be a little flirty like Chat and a little sappy like Adrien. He could make her laugh with lame jokes and sweep her off her feet with his impeccable manners. He could get excited about sweets and not care if she beat him at every video game he owned…

He could be real with Marinette.

He could have so much more with her.

So what if his heart didn't try to beat its way out of his chest at the sight of his adorable classmate? The warm feeling that swelled with in him whenever Marinette smiled was equally addictive. Could he have deeper feelings for Marinette if he allowed them to grow? He wouldn't know if never gave them a chance.

Marinette was not Ladybug; he couldn't measure one by the other. And he couldn't measure his emotions that way either. He wanted- no, needed this chance with Marinette to be different so he could give it a fair shot.

There was no point in making comparisons, not only was it unfair but he had the sinking feeling that there wouldn't be much to compare anyhow since his experiences with Ladybug were rather limited.

But with Marinette the possibilities could be endless.

Acknowledging this line of thought did not take away the sting of Ladybug's confession. Adrien's heart was cracked and bruised, his emotions exhausted and torn. But he was not broken.

Marinette was her own person and that was enough for now. Come whatever may happen between them, Adrien was going to make damn sure Ladybug had nothing to do with it.

 

* * *

 

 

"You really should set your alarm earlier, Marinette." Tikki admonished in her gentle, up-beat way, her large blue eyes filled with exasperated amusement as she watched her charge scurry around her bedroom getting herself ready for school.

"Its fine Tikki, I'll just be fashionably late," Marinette replied breathlessly, her voice muffled by the shirt stuck over her head as she pulled on her skinny jeans blindly.

"I don't think school is the place you're supposed to make a grand entrance," the kwami giggled. With unsuspecting strength or a creature so small Tikki tugged Marinette's shirt down, freeing her head and gave the teen's cheek an affectionate pat. "Besides, I thought you would have wanted to get to school early so you could talk to Adrien."

Marinette blushed. "Well, I overslept so it will have to wait."

"But you weren't sleeping because you hardly slept at all last night. And when the alarm sounded you put your pillow over your head and tried to hide under your blankets," Tikki teased, "I think you're stalling."

"Am not!"

"Are too!"

"Am not!" Marinette cried with a stomp of her dainty foot for emphasis. When Tikki dissolved into a fit of tinkling laughter, Marinette grinned sheepishly, "Okay, so maybe I was stalling a little. But now we really need to go. Come on, Tikki."

In a blur of black and pink Marinette zipped through the bakery, snagging a cookie for her kwami and calling out a goodbye to her parents. In the distance the bell rang and she raced across the street toward the school, narrowly missing pedestrians and vehicles in her haste. By the time she reached her classroom she was flushed, out of breath and feeling a little sick to her stomach from nerves. Taking a deep breath, she mustered her best apologetic smile and opened the door, unexpectedly tripping over her own feet and stumbling gracelessly into the classroom.

The surprised quiet was broken by collective snickering earning the tardy girl a disapproving frown from Mlle. Bustier.

"So nice of you could join us, Marinette." The teacher snapped.

"Sorry Mlle. Bustier," she pouted, keeping her eyes down and slipping into her seat.

In her peripheral vision Marinette saw how Adrien turned in his seat to watch her. She could feel his stare tingle along her skin, but she didn't dare peek up from her task as she arranged her books before her knowing that she wouldn't be able to keep from staring back at the handsome boy. It was bad enough her face was aflame from everyone's laughter; she didn't need his pretty green eyes to steal her wits away as well.

Alya kicked her foot under the desk table.

Marinette ignored her.

Just when she was certain she couldn't keep her curiosity at bay any longer, Nino punched Adrien's shoulder in warning getting the blond boy to turn around and face forward. Marinette sagged in her seat breathing a silent sigh of relief.

Alya kicked her foot again, harder.

Marinette kicked her friend back just as a folded note dropped onto her open textbook. She side-eyed Alya but the Lady-blogger only grinned, pointing at Adrien.

A note from Adrien…

Marinette's eyes widened in full blown panic and jerked to the back of the blond head in front of her. A note only meant one thing; she was getting her answer, right here right now in the middle of class where everyone could bear witness to her utter humiliation. Swallowing hard against the internal freak out just waiting to erupt, she opened the note carefully, bracing herself for the worst…

_I was hoping to see you this morning_

That was… not an outright rejection.

Marinette's breath released in a rush as a different kind of nervousness twisted her stomach. Unsure what to respond, she kept her reply neutral.

_Sorry, I overslept as usual lol_

Reaching over Marinette dropped the note onto the bench seat beside Adrien. There was no way in hell she could focus on class now. Instead she doodled in the margins of her note book and waited for his response. A few minutes later Adrien leaned back in his seat and stretched, discreetly dropping the note onto her textbook again.

_Can we talk at lunch hour?_

Marinette had to bite her lip to keep from smiling.

_Sure thing_

She watched Adrien's back as he read over her reply and she could have sworn his shoulders seemed to relax a little. She should have known that Adrien wouldn't crush her feelings in a careless note. He wanted to talk to her and it could very well be to let her down gently but at least he was considerate enough not to upset her in front of everyone. It was really hard not to love the boy.

However, the dreamy expression was ripped from Marinette's face when Alya kicked her under the desk table for a third time. This time it was hard enough to make her yelp. With a purple face and a withering glare at Alya, who smiled back innocently, Marinette sunk down in her seat and wrote her friend a quick progress report.

_We're meeting at lunch to talk. I'll fill you in later. QUIT KICKING ME!_

It was apparently enough to appease the Lady-blogger because she kept her foot to herself, much to the relief of Marinette's ankle.

 

 

* * *

 

 

Adrien impatiently tapped his pen against the desk, oblivious to Nino's disgruntled glare, as he watched the clock willing it to move faster. He was desperate to talk to Marinette, eager to have things settled between them. Maybe then he could get her off his mind for a few hours and actually focus on his neglected school work and not what he wanted to say to her.

To admit her confession had wreaked havoc on his head would be an understatement. Once he'd made up his mind to go for it, shy little Marinette was all he'd been able to think about. He wasn't proud to admit that a large part of it was because knowing Marinette found him lovable was soothing the cut of Ladybug's rejection, but aside from that Adrien actually wanted to make a good impression with her. He intended to be honest and tell her everything so it was important that he articulate his feelings properly. He didn't want assumptions and miscommunications to plague them in the future.

When the bell finally rang for lunch Adrien was wound so tightly he sprang from his seat like a jack-in-a-box, stuffing his books into his satchel haphazardly, a far cry from his usual meticulous tendencies. Plastering a well-practiced smile on his face, he turned to Marinette looking for all the world like he was in control, when in truth his heart tugged in his chest and every memorized line melted away at the sight of her hopeful yet hesitant smile.

"H-Hey," she stammered softly.

Had he ever noticed how pretty she was? He'd thought her adorable; had even acknowledged she was cute. But right at this moment, looking up at him with clear eyes as endlessly blue as the sky, the apple of her cheeks tinted pink as she worried her bottom lip between her teeth, Adrien felt like he'd never really seen her before.

When her gaze skittered away uncertainly, he was pulled from his trance.

"I was thinking we could go to the park," he blurted out abruptly, hoping he didn't come across stiff and commanding like his father. He relaxed slightly when her smile widened and she nodded, situating her book bag and motioning for him to lead the way.

They walked together in expectant silence, Adrien noticing the curious stares from some of the other students. He was used to attention, it rarely bothered him anymore. Marinette would have to get used to it though. Being seen with an Agreste was going to get her noticed and he hoped she would be okay with that. That was something he would have to warn her about if she wanted him in her life.

It was a short distance to the park but by the time they claimed a bench and settled down, the silence was starting to become stifling. Their eyes met in a shared side-glance and they both spoke at once.

"Marinette-"

"Adrien-"

They stopped short, awkward laughter overtaking the uncomfortable quiet until Marinette nudged his arm with her elbow. "You first."

Okay. He could do this.

"Your note surprised me," Adrien started with a sheepish smile, "It shouldn't have, maybe, but I'm not always good at reading people. I honestly had no idea how you felt. But now, knowing that you care so much about me means more to me than I can put into words."

Marinette smiled wryly, "But?"

Was he that obvious?

He sighed deeply, rubbing his neck nervously, really hoping this part didn't ruin everything. "But, there is someone I have feelings for. She doesn't return them, I know that now, and it's probably for the best, but…" he shrugged a shoulder helplessly, "You deserve to know."

It could have been the sadness that seeped into his voice, or the shadow that clouded his expression, but Marinette didn't recoil at his admission. She surprised him with her genuine concern.

"Why on earth would she turn you down?" she asked, sounding upset for him.

"Affection can't be forced, I know that better than anyone," he replied with a certainty borne of a home life that left him desperate for something more. There was no point in telling Marinette that he hadn't actually confessed his feelings to Ladybug, it was enough that she understood that he was no longer holding out for someone who couldn't be what he needed. But when Marinette flinched, he realized she'd taken his statement the wrong way.

"I-It's okay Adrien. P-P-Please don't feel b-bad. I didn't e-expect you to feel the s-same about me," she stammered earnestly, her discomfiture returning with a vengeance. It was like he could see her walls slamming back into place, shutting him out and he didn't like it one bit.

"Wait! That's not what I meant," he backpedaled, mentally kicking himself. Borrowing a bit of Chat's boldness, Adrien took her hand in his, locking their gazes so she would understand exactly how he was serious was. "The point I'm trying to make is; I've been so busy chasing a pipe dream that I never noticed what was right in front of me. But I see you and if you could give me a chance I want to try figure this out with you."

"Oh," Marinette breathed ever so softly, eyes wide and slightly unfocused, "Okay."

He wasn't sure what to make of her reaction so he soldiered on.

"To be fair I don't know you as well I'd like. You're always so shy around me and uncomfortable; I kinda thought you didn't like me at all actually. Now that I know I was totally wrong, I want to get to know you better. Maybe we could… I don't know, hang out and do stuff together. You know, just see what happens from there."

Adrien finally understood the courage it took for Marinette to give him that note, to expose her inner most feelings and offer them up under his scrutiny and chance finding out she wasn't good enough. Even now he half expected her to brush him off and the very thought sent his stomach coiling into a vicious knot.

But then Marinette grinned, her eyes crinkling with excitement, and he felt like he could breathe again. She sounded a little dazed and a whole lot happy as she asked, "You really mean it, don't you?"

"Definitely," he promised, her joy triggering a similar emotion within himself. "You're an amazing friend and I want to know if we could be… more," he added shyly, unable to contain his lopsided smirk.

"I'd like that too," she beamed, squeezing his hand that he'd forgotten was still holding hers.

Warmth and contentment filled Adrien as he sat beside Marinette, relishing the connection that was beginning to form and looking forward to the tentative steps it would take to create something between them that would make it all worthwhile.

Blinded by her exuberance it was a simple thing to ignore the nagging little whisper in the back of his mind that warned it couldn't possibly be this easy, black cats almost never had this kind of good luck.

 


	2. In which boundaries are poked, prodded and eventually pushed… just a tiny bit.

“So whatchya wanna do?” Marinette asked as she dropped her book bag onto her bedroom floor, kicking off her pink flats and setting her purse down gently on her desk. She grinned as Adrien dropped into her desk chair, flung his satchel carelessly to the side and began to spin the chair in lazy circles.

In the nearly three months since their heart to heart talk, visits from Adrien had become a regular occurrence; as in whenever Adrien could spare the time in between all of his studies and lessons and practices he could usually be found either in her room keeping her company or in the bakery indulging his inner fat kid. Today he was killing time before his piano lesson and Marinette was happy just to have him there.

“I brought over a new anime. I haven’t seen this one yet,” he replied, nudging his satchel with his foot as it passed in his rotation. With a happy “Eep” and no sense of other people’s property, Marinette began rooting through his bag until she found the DVD case and flipped it over to read the back.

“Oooh,” her interest peaked as her eyes scanned the summary, “a virtual reality game that traps players inside and if they get killed in game they die in real life. This sounds pretty cool actually. I definitely want to watch this but I’d rather wait until we have time to watch an episode or two. You have to leave in a half an hour.”

Marinette giggled as Adrien wrinkled his nose in distaste.

“I really wish I could skip the lesson today but since that is absolutely out of the question…” He tried to fool her with his innocent expression but then his mouth curled up on one side in what she’d come to know as his up-to-something grin. “Want to go downstairs and get us some snacks?”  

Marinette rolled her eyes. “Don’t you get fed at home?”

“Yes,” Adrien whined, kicking off the floor to spin the desk chair faster, “but our chef makes healthy stuff.”

“Are you implying that my family’s bakery goods aren’t healthy?” she huffed, folding her arms in stubborn defiance.

Adrien stopped spinning to give her look that clearly said ‘Duh’. “It’s delicious; of course it’s not good for you. If I lived off of pastries and croissants I’d be one fat cat. Happy mind you, but probably bigger than the Eiffel Tower.”

“Is food all you think about?”

Adrien laughed, his eyes lowering as the tips of his ears tinged pink, “Most of the time.”

It wasn’t fair. His smile, his laugh, they did funny things to her insides, things that made her want to kiss him, things that made making out sound like really good way to spend thirty minutes.

“Or we could start on homework,” he offered with notably less enthusiasm and she blinked, returning to their conversation. “Your call.”

Blushing, Marinette jumped at the excuse to flee the room and collect her wits which had abandoned ship that the thought of finally getting a kiss from the teen heartthrob who was currently sporting a crooked grin on his perfect lips...   

“Well if those are my options then let me see what I can scrounge up,” she squeaked, “Be right back.”

Mariette flew down the stairs, her bare feet a pitter patter against the hardwood floor, and rounded the corner nearly running smack into her mother. Taking in her daughter’s flustered state; Sabine smiled knowingly holding a small plate with assorted pastries both savory and sweet. “Here sweetie, I was about to bring this upstairs and see if you and your friend wanted something to eat.”

Marinette read between the lines; _There will be no shenanigans on my watch_.

“Thanks Maman! You’re the best.” Taking the plate, she leaned over and gave her mother a peck on the cheek before spinning back toward the stairs.

“Oh and Marinette, tell Adrien he must stay for dinner one evening. You’re father and I would like a chance to get to know him too.”

“Um… yeah, okay… I’m going back to my room now.”

Once back within her bubblegum pink sanctuary, Marinette closed the trap door and winced. It wasn’t too soon to invite Adrien for dinner, was it? He was over multiple times a week after school, so if he stayed a little longer it wouldn’t be a big deal, right? Okay, better to just get it over and done, like ripping of a band aid.

With a deep breath, she blurted, “My parents want you to stay for dinner one night, if that’s okay with you. Before you say yes understand that they can be pushy and loud and Papa thinks he’s funny but really he’ll just embarrass me and Maman will ask you a ton of questions and I don’t want you to feel awkward-”

“Hey, it’s okay Marinette. I’d love to stay for dinner. Your family is really awesome. You have no idea how lucky you are.” Something in Adrien’s tone hinted at envy but Marinette couldn’t for the life if her figure out why Adrien Agreste would be jealous of her painfully ordinary family. But when he beamed at her, clearly happy about the invitation, she didn’t give the odd notion a second thought. Obviously he just wanted tasty, unhealthy food.

“Here, help yourself.” She set down the plate of treats within his reach. With a hop and a wriggle Marinette perched on the desk, kicking her feet back and forth as she selected a chocolate chip cookie.

Adrien picked up a different cookie looking at it curiously. “What’s this one?”

“Chinese Almond cookie, Maman makes them for Papa and me. They’re really good but she swears Grandpapa made the best ones,” Marinette replied. Instead of taking a tentative bite, Adrien surprised her by popping the entire cookie into his mouth. When he made happy noises, she snickered, “I told you they were good.”

“Those are awesome! You should sell them in the bakery.”

“We do, the week of the Lunar New year.” When he gave her a questioning look, Marinette explained, “It’s a big holiday in the Asian culture. Those cookies supposedly bring good fortune. The rest of the time Maman makes them for us because I need those in my life more than once a year and I can eat almost an entire batch all by myself.”

“And I never knew about these,” he pouted, taking another almond cookie and popping it in his mouth. He kicked the swivel chair into a slow spin once more. “It must be super cool to have parents that come from different nationalities.”

“I guess. I don’t know if I’ve ever really thought about it. Most people don’t realize I’m a quarter Chinese,” she admitted. “Maybe it would be different if we were close to the family we have in China. Aside from Uncle Wang and his daughter Xu Lien and her family, I don’t even know the others.”

“Seriously?” Adrian stopped spinning the chair, looking baffled. “But they’re your relatives, why wouldn’t you keep in contact?”

“When my Grandparents married there was a falling out with his parents because they wanted him to return to China and marry a woman from there. For a long time they didn’t speak at all. Over time he reconciled with Uncle Wang but I don’t know about the others. Maman never talks about them.”

“That sucks,” Adrien mused thoughtfully, taking the last almond cookie. He offered it to her but Marinette shook her head knowing there was more she could have later, and watched as he turned the cookie between his fingers as he spoke.

“My parents were only children so I don’t have cousins or anything. It’s just my Father and I now. I hardly see him most of the time; he’s so busy with the company…” Adrien shrugged a shoulder, as if trying to lessen the vulnerability that seeped into his words. “I think that’s part of the reason he keeps my schedule so busy, so I don’t have time be bored or lonely.”

Suddenly Marinette had awful feeling she knew why Adrien had seemed envious of her family, even why he preferred to be at her house rather than at his own, and not for the reason she had hoped.

“Does it work?” she asked, though she already knew the answer.

“Not really,” he grinned too easily, “I just get lonely and really, really tired.”

Adrien fell silent after his admission as he nibbled on his cookie and Marinette watched him surreptitiously from under her lashes. This was a side of Adrian she had never seen before. He was always so kind, so positive, so seemingly perfect in every way that she never doubted his home life was equally as postcard worthy. But really; how naïve of her to assume that just because Adrien smiled and joked that it meant he was always happy. For so long she’d been blinded by her crush, dazzled by his pretty face and polite charm, that she had never seen him clearly. But the more time they spent together, just two kids hanging out, she was starting to see past his carefully constructed image.

Marinette was thrilled she finally getting to know the real Adrian. And she was also terrified she was falling harder than she ever thought possible.

Startled from their thoughts; both teens jumped when Adrien’s phone chimed with a received text message. He quickly scanned the text before rising to his feet and picking up his satchel from the floor, waving Marinette away when she tried to hand him the DVD he’d brought.

“I’ll leave it here that way I’m not tempted to watch it at home,” he explained.

“Alright,” she nodded and set the case back down on her desk. “I’ll see you tomorrow then.”

“Yep, and thanks for the cookies.”

Adrien paused at her side, giving her shoulder an affectionate pat, a platonic parting gesture she’d come to expect whenever he would leave. But sometimes, like today, he would look into her eyes and hesitate, his expression intent as if he were contemplating something more. And Marinette would hope, as her heart pounded and her breathing stuttered, that he would make some kind of move; anything to let her know he was feeling it as well, that magnetic pull that always sparked to life between them whenever he dared to stand too close.

But like every time before, Adrien looked away first and huffed a nearly silent, derisive laugh, snatching his hand away to clutch his satchel in a white knuckled grip. The anticipation that had begun to build within Marinette abruptly dissipated at the loss of his touch and she forced a cheerful smile to hide the crushing disappointment that engulfed her. 

Marinette didn’t move a muscle as Adrien opened the trap door and started down the stairs. She barely managed a nod when he looked back at her and smiled, “Later, Marinette.” She didn’t even chance drawing a breath until she heard the front door to the flat close with a firm click.

Only then did Marinette finally give into the frustrated tears that made it impossible to breathe; Tikki patting her hair gently as she quietly cried out every bit of longing she had for the boy who was closer than ever but yet still remained just out of reach.

 

* * *

 

 

“Hey Nino, may I ask you a… uh… personal question?”

Chilling with his best friend in the refuge of his bedroom, Adrian mashed the buttons on his controller, only half paying attention to the TV screen and the mech he was playing as he tried to formulate the embarrassing question in his mind. Desperate times called for desperate measures and while he usually didn’t gush to Nino about his unrequited love for Ladybug or his consistently growing feelings for Marinette, right now was an exception to that rule.

Ever the jovial friend, Nino worked his own controller without missing a beat. “Shoot.”

It was important for Adrien to phrase his question with tact; the last thing he needed was to sound like a pervert. It was bad enough he had to resort to asking for this kind of advice in the first place. Nino was his only viable option- since he actually had a girlfriend- so it just made sense.

Swallowing hard, he went for it. “How did you… uh… initiate things… with Alya?”

“Dude, she won’t let me get past second base so I’m still a virgin,” Nino whined, seeming more than a little bummed out by that fact.

Heat exploded across Adrien’s face and he was sure a tomato couldn’t hold a candle to him at that moment. Backpedaling, he cried, “Woah! Too personal.” The future DJ snickered at his discomfort and in his flustered state Adrien pressed the wrong button, inadvertently handing Nino the game. Glaring at his friend, he groused, “That is sooo not what I was asking.”

“Gotta be more specific, bro,” Nino chuckled. Pointing to Adrien’s controller he asked, “Again?”

Adrien shook his head, his mind not in any condition to play Mecha Strike. It was too late to change the subject now, so he pressed on, “Well… like the first time you kissed her… Did you just lay one on her? Or did you say something smooth first and then lead her into it? And did she slap you or kiss you back?”

Tossing his own controller to the side, Nino repositioned himself on Adrien’s white sofa so he could give his floundering friend his full attention. “You’re jonesing to kiss Marinette,” he stated smugly.

Adrien rolled his eyes. “No shit Sherlock. I sure as hell don’t want to kiss Alya.” Realizing how that sounded, he winced. “I mean, you know, no offense to Alya or anything…”

Nino just grinned. “I got ya dude.” He toyed with the headphones draped around his neck, tapping the plastic in a random beat as he thought about the question at hand. “Hmmm, well the first time she kissed me, actually. See, Alya goes after what she wants, that’s just how my girl rolls,” he explained, his expression somewhat apologetic for not being much help.

“Crap!” Adrien hissed. “I seriously feel like I’m losing my mind.”

“You got it bad.”

Plagg had been telling him the same thing. Every. Damn. Night.

“I know, believe me,” Adrien admitted ruefully. “But I don’t know what the hell I’m doing. I get so damn nervous around her, especially when we’re alone together. And I want to touch her but I chicken out every time…”

It was embarrassing to own up to his failures. Everyone expected him to be cool and suave, his image demanding he play the part; but the truth was quite different. He wasn’t the player that had girls eating out of the palm of his hand. He wasn’t the star that thrived in the spotlight of unrelenting attention. He wasn’t the guy who could have anything he wanted without any effort at all.

Everything he had also came with a price. Even his freedom as Chat Noir required a debt to be paid. And so would this thing he had going with Marinette. She was great, and amazing and more patient with him than he deserved; but she wasn’t going to wait around forever. She was expecting to be met half way but she also expected him to have a fucking clue. He was so afraid of letting her down or over stepping boundaries or just outright saying the wrong thing that he did nothing at all.

Even Adrian knew it was time to grow a pair and make a move.    

Like he was reading Adrien’s mind, Nino channeled the voice of reason. “You’re over thinking it. Quit stressing, bro. This is Marinette we’re talking about. She’ll be cool with it.”

The logical part of his brain said Nino was right. Still, it wouldn’t be the first time he’d been certain of something only to find out he’d horribly wrong from the start.

“I can’t take Marinette’s feelings for granted,” Adrien sighed, frustration coloring his words. “I almost screwed us up before we even started by being an oblivious idiot. And with my luck, I’ll screw it up even worse next time.” Because there would be a next time, of that Adrien had absolutely no doubt. Agitated at his own thoughts, he raked his hands through his sunny hair, tugging harshly at the strands. “Dude, I’m having a meltdown,” he moaned pitifully.  

“I can see that.” Nino deadpanned.

First Plagg, now Nino. He really needed more sympathetic friends.

“Then fucking help!”

It was the cussing, since Adrien never had a potty-mouth, that spurred Nino into action. “You two are going to the movies later, right?” he asked and Adrien nodded. “Your mission is to hold her hand. Forget about everything else, that will come later all on its own. For tonight keep it simple.”

Keep it simple.

Simple was good. He could work with simple.

“Ok,” Adrien nodded, trying to psych himself up, “I can do that. I think.”

“No think,” Nino barked, “Just do.

Right… hold Marinette’s hand.

Piece of cake.

 

* * *

 

 

“So, how is not-dating your not-boyfriend going?

Marinette gave Alya the stink eye over the rim of her café au lait and continued to blow on the steaming liquid. Curiosity was raging in her friend’s eyes, practically radiating off of the darker skinned girl. Like the good friend that she was, Marinette drew out the suspense by making Alya wait; taking a cautious sip of her hot drink, leaning back in the wroth iron chair and averting gaze to the pedestrians that passed by just outside the gated patio of the little café.

“Girl, I will text Adrian and ask him. Don’t make me pull out the big guns,” Alya warned playfully, her smirk full of mischievous intent. Taking a gulp of her frozen mocha drink, she snatched up her phone and waved it teasingly, giving Marinette another chance to comply.   

“Ugh! Fine,” Marinette sighed will a roll of her blue-bell eyes, “We’re going to the movies tonight. We’re meeting up there after his photo shoot which-” she glanced down at her cell phone to check the time, “should be starting in twenty minutes. Hopefully it doesn’t run late and he has to cancel like last time.”

“That’s right,” Alya exclaimed eagerly, “Nino did say he was hanging out with Adrien earlier because he had a thing tonight. I assumed he meant the shoot but now your boy is sneaking in a date…” she trailed off, her innocent expression belied by the loaded insinuation of her comment.

“Not a date, just a movie,” Marinette replied firmly, a trace if dejection slipping into her tone. She took another sip of her drink, savoring the rich flavor before she continued, “And we’ve started watching a new anime, Sword Art Online. It’s really good. I think you’d like it.”

Alya looked at her incredulously. “Girl, are you telling me you _like_ anime now?”

Biting back an amused smile, at which she failed miserably, Marinette shrugged a delicate shoulder but refused to comment. Her silence was answer enough.

“OMG!” Alya half hissed half screeched in a weird vocal combination that only she could achieve. “What is happening to you? First it was RPG’s and now its anime…” her ocher eyes widened in mock horror, “I feel like I don’t know you anymore. Who are you and what have you done with Marinette?”

There was some truth to her friend’s dramatic teasing. Adrien had introduced Marinette a few of his favorite pastimes and, as it turned out, she’d found them to be entertaining as well. But she also suspected that Adrien’s company may have upped her like factor a little as well.

Laughing helplessly, Marinette admitted, “He makes it fun.”

“Who knew hot stuff, poster-boy Adrien was such a dork?” Alya mused with a baffled shake of her auburn head.

It was one of the hidden gems in Adrien’s personality, that despite the ever-confident charisma he exuded, he was his happiest geeking out over strategy games and having lengthy discussions about the latest anime he had gotten her to watch. Honestly, she’d half expected him to be a little stuffy and have affluent interests but it had been a pleasant surprise to see just how down to earth he was, behaving like a normal kid when there was no one around to pass judgement. She was grateful that whatever was going on between them had at least presented this opportunity for her to see past her blinding crush to boy that Adrien truly was.

“He’s a total nerd,” she agreed fondly, “and he’s wonderful and sweet and caring and everything a girl could possibly want…”

“But…?” Alya frowned.

There always seemed to be a catch.

“I still don’t know where I stand with him,” Marinette sighed deeply, deflating as her shoulders slumped with a wry sense of defeat. Clutching her cup, her eyes fell to the pale liquid where a faint version of her pensive reflection stared back at her. “I take that back, I do know. I’m so far in the friend zone I may as well be a guy.”

Alya arched a brow and started laughing. “Um… No. I’ve seen the way that boy looks at you and he definitely does not look at Nino or any of the other guys that way. He for sure knows you’re a girl and with all the girly parts to match.” She winked. “And I bet he’s thought about those girly parts quite a lot recently.”

“Alya!” Marinette flushed, clearly scandalized. “I’m… no…I… grrr! Okay, not literally but you get where I’m going with this. It’s been nearly three months and… nothing. We’re not dating, he doesn’t try anything and… and he’s never even attempted to kiss me,” she muttered and slumped in her chair once more.

Sobering, Alya expression turned sympathetic as she considered her friend’s situation. “I feel ya, girl. I can totally see why that sucks.”

“Sometimes I think it might be better if I could just get over him and be done with it. Then we could be friends and I wouldn’t complicate everything because I’m so hopelessly in love with him.”

“So… what? After all of this time you’re just going to throw in the towel and give up?” Alya asked, alarmed.

Could she? Did she have the conviction to tell him it was better to only be friends and remove her feelings completely from the equation? Was she that selfless?

Just the thought caused Marinette’s heart to thump painfully in her chest and she accepted that as a no, she was selfish enough to take whatever she could get.

“I probably should but I won’t,” she laughed humorlessly. “It hurts to be so close to him and to feel so much for him and to force myself to keep it bottled up so I don’t scare him off. But it’s too late; at this point I can’t imagine him not being there.” Her eyes found Alya’s, seeking understanding, “It’s just… it was easier not to feel so much when he didn’t notice me at all.”

It was the affectionate concern plastered across Alya’s face that finally kicked Marinette in the butt and out of her funk. She could lament her heart’s choices later with Tikki, in her bed with the covers bundled up to her nose. This was best-friend-bonding time, not cry-about-a-boy time.

Determined, Marinette perked up in her seat and waved a hand airily, “I’m being dramatic, don’t mind me. Enough about silly boys. We need a new topic, my dear.”

She took another sip of her café au lait as Alya leveled her with a contemplative look. Apparently her friend found what she was looking for because the spectacled girl turned her attention to her phone and pulled up her blog page.

“I need ideas for next month’s LadyBlog posts…”

 

* * *

 

 

For once a photo shoot had wrapped up early.

It seemed like after Nino had departed- with direct orders for his friend and a fist bump for good luck- time had warped into ludicrous speed. Adrien had showered, changed and was ready to leave for the shoot yet he still had time to kill and so his mind had started to wander into dangerous territory. All of the things that could go wrong flashed in his mind’s eye, each possibility a daunting reminder that he’d never tried to hold a girl’s hand before. Hell, he’d never done anything with a girl before, period. Unless he counted the times Chloe had kissed him on the cheek; but that was Chloe in her ostentatious way, so he didn’t count those because he’d never kissed her back.

Adrien was on the verge of panicking when in a moment of pure genius he’d thought of something that just might tip the odds of luck in his favor.

Months ago, while practicing with Mariette for the Mecha Strike tournament, she’d given him a good luck charm. He hadn’t thought much of it at the time and had put it away with the rest of his treasured knickknacks. In fact he’d nearly forgotten all about it until the other day when Marinette had told him about the cookies and how they brought good fortune. He had suddenly remembered the oriental style charm she had given him and the thought had stayed in the back of his mind.

Grinning madly, he’d rescued the little red, gold and green charm from its safe place on his bookshelf and once he’d slipped it into his pocket he’d felt more confident immediately.

Maybe his lucky charm was the reason the photo shoot had gone smoothly; so smoothly in fact that every shot was gold and he could have sworn Vincent was about to cry tears of joy at such a feat of photographic perfection. The only down side was that he’d made it to the movie theatre nearly an hour early. But that was okay, it gave him time to get his head together.

Covertly, Adrien scanned the crowded sidewalk from where he leaned against the building, one foot flat against the stone wall as the other supported his weight, looking cover worthy in his form fitting, slate grey pullover with the sleeves rolled up to his elbows and his black skinny jeans. He wasn’t sure why he was searching because Marinette wouldn’t arrive for another half hour at least, but it didn’t stop his gaze from seeking out even the slightest glimpse of her midnight hair.

Plagg had teased him about having a type. Maybe his kwami was right. The two main ladies in his life had very similar traits that started with the same dark hair and continued right down to their clear blue eyes and petite builds.

But sometimes Adrien wondered…

How much of a coincidence was it that Ladybug and Marinette had the same shade of blue-ish black hair and wore it in almost identical pigtails?

That they had the same deep blue eyes that could stab right through him and pierce not just his heart but his very soul as well?

And how uncanny that they were the same height and- if he were to guess- wore about the same size?

Still, Adrien wouldn’t go so far as to say he was onto something. They may appear similar but that was where the similarities ended. The two girls could not have been more at opposite ends of the spectrum if they tried. While Marinette was adorably shy, occasionally awkward and prone to bouts of calamitous clumsiness; Ladybug was graceful, coolly confident and usually one step ahead of him in most situations.

So he chalked it up to wishful thinking on his part; because wouldn’t that make everything so much easier if he found out he’d managed to fall for the same girl twice?

But even before Plagg and Chat, Adrien had ever had that kind of good fortune and he refused to allow himself to get his hopes up. He was pretty sure he was only seeing what he wanted to see and not what was really there… or not there in his case.

Stuffing his hands in his pockets, mainly to keep from running them through his hair anxiously, Adrien accidentally squished Plagg and yelped when his kwami bit him none too gently in reciprocation. Snatching his hand back he shook it vigorously against the pain and then checked to see if the little bastard had drawn blood. Muttering a curse under his breath, he reached in his other pocket and pulled out his lucky charm instead.

Adrien didn’t even realize a soft smile overtook his harsh frown as he traced a finger over the clover carved into the small jade stone. It was a cheery little thing and colorful, much like Marinette herself. And he wondered if that was what love really was; the gentle feeling of belonging, comfort and happiness that filled him when Marinette was near?

Of course his feelings for Ladybug were very reflective of the heroine as well; fierce, consuming and maddening.

Adrien felt the yank on his heartstrings whenever he was in his Lady’s presence, but his emotions hung like cut ribbons dangling in a tornado with no anchor and no purpose. With Marinette, however, those strings had latched on and were thriving like vines, tangled and messy but steadily flourishing. And he was okay with that, hell he was more than okay, he was freakin’ ecstatic. For so long he had lacked the most basic forms of companionship, but now he had someone who wanted to be there by his side and it was almost too good to be true. It almost didn’t seem real.

Or maybe he was just waiting for the universe to realize he was finally happy and decide to rip it all away.

“Adrien!”

Pulled from his contrary thoughts by Marinette’s exuberant call, his expression lit up as she approached him. He took in the sight of her and his heart melted. She was dream straight from the pages of a vintage fashion magazine. He couldn’t recall having ever seen her with her hair in a messy bun and so he couldn’t help it; his eyes raked over her form from the top of the pink flower print halter top sundress that tied at the back of her neck down past the gently flare of her hips to the flowy shirt that ended a few inches above her knees and teased him with a flirty peek of creamy skin as she walked.

Holy crap! She was killing him in her alluringly innocent way and she wasn’t even trying. He shuddered to think what would happen if she actually put forth some effort.

Blushing hard, Adrien stepped toward her, shoving the charm back into his pocket and grinned sheepishly. “Hey.”

“I thought I was going to be late,” she stated breathlessly as she fell into step beside him. “The lines are long. Think we’ll make it in time?”

“We’re good. I purchased the tickets already.”

Marinette blinked. “I thought we agreed it was my turn?”

“You said it was your turn,” Adrien corrected with just a touch of smugness. “As I recall I didn’t respond so therefore I agreed to nothing.”

“You… but… That’s shady, Agreste. Really shady,” she scowled.

“No, it’s gentlemanly. I asked you to come with me so it’s only fair that I pay for your ticket.” As if to drive home his point, Adrien opened the entrance door and ushered her through before following her inside.

“Well, I’m a modern girl with new age sensibilities,” she huffed indignantly, but the effect was ruined by the warm smile that pulled at the corners of her pursed lips.

Placing his hand against the small of her back Adrien guided her through the crowded lobby. “And I’m old fashioned when it comes to treating a girl right. It doesn’t mean I think of you as inferior or something. It means I respect you and I’m going to behave in a way that reflects that.”

Marinette’s eyes widened as she flushed scarlet in the span of a heartbeat. “You can’t just say stuff like that… it’s not fair.”

“Why?” he asked, honestly curious.

With a dubious look Marinette sassily replied, “Because I’ve got nothing in my arsenal for that.”

Adrien couldn’t help the genuine laugh that bubbled forth at her unexpected response. Her thought process never failed to intrigue him. Shaking his head in amusement, he sighed, “This isn’t war, Marinette.”

“I know that.” He hadn’t eve realized they had stopped walking until her gaze skittered away and she wrapped her arms around her stomach defensively. “But your way seems more like a… a… d-d-date,” she stammered softly.

Adrien didn’t think, he simple followed his gut when it told him that now was the moment; right there amidst a sea of nameless strangers in the cinema’s bustling lobby he grasped her hand and tugged her a step closer, lacing his fingers with hers. Pinning her with a disarming grin that was mostly a window to Adrien’s hopefulness infused with a liberal amount of Chat’s inflated confidence, he outright asked, “Would that be a bad thing?”

The smitten boy swore his heart did a cartwheel when Marinette smiled shyly and shook her head no.

And just like that Adrien was soaring; feet off the ground, head in the clouds, nothing could touch him to bring him down, soaring. With her smaller hand clasped in his and their fingers entwined as her warm palm burned against his own in the most pleasant way, he couldn’t focus on anything else.

Functioning on auto-pilot, Adrien let Marinette lead the way to find seats and followed her with a besotted grin. Movie… what movie? He was too engrossed with watching Marinette through the corner of his eye, mesmerized by the way the glow of the big screen played off her pretty face, to pay any attention to what was actually happening in the film. It certainly didn’t help his awareness when she leaned into him, her arm pressed flush to his on their shared armrest, fingers locked together tightly.

Adrien refused to let her go, even after the movie was over, and he gave himself a mental high-five for having the forethought to sneak out of the mansion earlier instead of having Nathalie arrange for the car to pick him up. The movie theatre was only a few streets away from the Dupain-Cheng bakery so there was no need to take the Metro which meant he was free to walk Marinette home and hold her hand the entire way.

They were a block away from the bakery when Adrian finally got the nerve to break the comfortable silence. “So… Uh, are you doing anything tomorrow?”

Marinette shook her head, a few midnight locks escaping their confines at the motion. “I was supposed to babysit Manon but there was a change in plans. Other than that, just homework. What about you? Anything exciting going on?”

“Nope, just homework,” he confirmed. “Next week I start competition practice for the fencing regionals so I probably won’t have much free time for a while.” He paused when she pouted, nearly floored by the desperate urge to kiss her until she smiled again. He hoped she didn’t notice the waver in his voice as he continued, “I’d like to hang out with you tomorrow while I’ve got the chance.”

Instantly Marinette perked up. “Picnic at the park?” she offered, grinning impishly. “I’ll even let you buy me ice cream.”

Adrien smirked back, one side of his mouth curling up roguishly. “Only if you bring your Dad’s quiche. That stuff is amazing.”

“I think I can manage that. Meet up around eleven?”

“It’s a date,” he replied deliberately, his smile slipping a notch as his confidence faltered. “If you want it to be, that is…?”

Instead of a verbal answer, Marinette pulled Adrien to a stop just out of sight of the bakery’s windows. She only gave him a second to wonder why she looked up at him determinedly and with her heart in her eyes before she pushed up on her tip-toes and pressed her soft lips to his cheek in a sweetly tentative kiss. His breath caught as his heart jolted into thunderous rhythm but as quickly as she leaned up Marinette ducked back again, appearing quite pleased with herself.

“See you tomorrow,” she winked and the amount of cockiness in the gesture could put Chat to shame. Then in a bur of pink she rounded the corner to the bakery entrance and slipped inside.

Adrien wasn’t sure how long he stood under the glow of the street lamp impersonating a statue, nor did he care. When his brain finally decided to function again, the dazed look on his face shifted into one of pure satisfaction. With a very Chat-like bounce to his step, he started the short walk home.

Humming a sappy little tune, Adrien pulled out his cell phone and tapped out a quick text to Nino; just two words that summed up what was probably the best night of his young life.

_Mission Accomplished_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A.N. – Here is the second installment. Our adorkable little love birds have made progress. This story will eventually cover all four corners of the love square and it’s gonna get messy. I have it mapped out as a total of 6 chapters. Since I’m writing this on my phone as well as my laptop, forgive me if you find any typos and/or grammar issues. Thanks for reading.


	3. In which Adrien unknowingly gives himself away and Marinette decides to blow it all to hell

 

The sun was shining brightly with beams of gold peeking through pristine white clouds as a gentle breeze caused a faint rustling through the trees. It was the perfect day to be at the park and Marinette was thankful her good luck had carried over to her date with Adrien.

Lying on the blanket they had spread out in the shade, Marinette pointed to one of the puffs of white slowly moving across the pale blue sky. “That cloud looks like a horse,” she stated decisively.

Adrien contemplated the cloud from where he lounged beside her, his arms folded beneath his head. “Ok, I can kind of see that. I was thinking a dragon but a horse works too.”

She pointed to another cloud. “That one to the left looks like… a mushroom?”

After a moment Adrien chuckled. “No, more like a ladybug.”

“Huh. It actually does.” Taking that as a good omen, Marinette grinned. “Now we need to find one that looks like a cat.”

“That’s right, can’t have one without the other,” he replied evenly.

“No. It wouldn’t be right.”

Suddenly Adrien leaned up, propping himself on one arm as he looked down at her excitedly. “Hey I’ve got a super cool idea. You know how in the Batman comics the have that beacon they shine over Gotham City whenever they need Batman’s help. Paris should do that for Ladybug and Chat Noir.”

“Really?” Marinette laughed doubtfully.

“Definitely. They could have a ladybug and a cat paw. It would be epic.” Her expression caused him to pause. “What?” 

Adrien was adorable, truly he was, but one of them had to resist geeking out and be sensible. “They would only be able to use it at night. No one would be able to see during the day,” she reasoned.

“So?”

“So, it’s not practical.”

“I still like my idea,” he pouted, flopping back onto the blanket.

Marinette was strong. She was made of sterner stuff, damn it! She was sure of that. But apparently not today because Adrien’s exaggerated sulk- complete with pitiful side glances at perfectly timed intervals- melted Marinette faster than an ice cube in August. “I guess it would be cool,” she amended with a resigned sigh, mentally cursing pretty boys and their soulful eyes.

“See,” Adrien declared with an air of smugness that reminded her of another blond haired, green eyed pretty boy. “I bet Chat Noir would go for it.”

“Of course _he_ would,” she joked, hoping Adrien didn’t notice her discomfort because it was just too weird to think about Chat and Adrien having any similarities.

“What’s that supposed to mean?” Adrien asked, turning his head to look at her curiously and with more intensity than their light hearted conversation called for.

“I’m not sure Paris could handle the fallout from his ego,” she smirked.

Adrien nodded solemnly. “That would be cat-astrophic.”

Marinette’s eyes widened and she groaned in utter despair. No, no no no no… She could handle anything Hawkmoth threw her way but she could not deal with more freakin’ puns. “I should have known you’d be a Chat Noir fan,” she grumbled.

“And you’re not?”

Her thoughts flew to her partner and a rush of platonic fondness filled Marinette. Chat Noir was like the brother she never had; annoying to a fault, loyal to the core and the best partner a heroine could ever ask for. Of course she was a fan. But like hell she’d ever tell that to the mangy feline. “Oh I like him just fine. It just seems like he could take things a little more seriously.”

Adrien seemed to consider what she said before replying, “I appreciate his humor. I mean think about it, they’re kids like us with the responsibility of saving thousands of lives every day. If you can laugh when everything is on the line and keep the fear from eating you alive then isn’t that the better option?”

Was that why Chat was always joking and playfully flirting? Not because he was incapable of taking their duty seriously but because it was a coping method? She’d never considered the possibility before and now… it made perfect sense. Maybe from now on she could make more of an effort to reign in her ire and attempt to appreciate his quirky sense of humor. It was the least she could do.

“I think you’re onto something. You’ve put a lot of thought into this?”

“What can I say, Ladybug is my favorite superhero ever, hands down. Chat Noir might make the top ten.”

And there it was again, Ladybug was everyone’s favorite while Chat was the better-than-nothing second choice. It rankled under her skin when people did that. They were partners, two halves of the same whole. He should get as much credit as she did and he certainly deserved as much respect.

“Everybody’s all about Ladybug,” Marinette frowned, “but she couldn’t save the day without Chat Noir. They’re a team. They should be counted as a set or something,” she insisted.

“Ok, well then _they_ would be my favorite. Happy now?” Adrien laughed, his jade eyes sparkling.

Marinette nodded primly. “Much better.”

They lapsed into silence; Adrien staring at the sky absently, with his mind far away while Marinette began to relax now that she had successfully maneuvered that particular landmine of a conversation. She was used to carefully phrasing responses and gaslighting leading questions thanks to Alya, but it was still an unnecessary stress when Ladybug and Chat Noir were the topic up for discussion.

Other than the mention of her alter ego, her date with Adrien was as easy as breathing. Once they packed up the blanket, he carried the wicker picnic basket like a proper gentleman as she linked her arm through his. They walked for a bit at a leisurely pace until they neared the ice cream vendor's cart and he tugged her to stop with an impish smile.

"You promised I could buy you ice cream," he reminded her gleefully and she chuckled helplessly as he led her to the cart with childish bounce his step. She would never get tired of Adrien's utter exuberance over food, it was too adorably endearing.

Marinette pegged him for a vanilla kind of guy, sweetly old fashioned and predictably delicious, so it surprised her when he seriously contemplated the flavor list as if it held the answer to all the mysteries in the universe and worried his lip indecisively. The vendor turned to her expectantly. "I would like a scoop of chocolate in a sugar cone please," she said simply.

The vendor tapped his fingers impatiently as Adrien looked slightly distressed over his choices. Then he perked up with a sudden mischievous grin. "Give me a scoop of blueberry, a scoop of peanut butter and a scoop of orange ginger in a waffle cone." He looked to Marinette inordinately proud of himself and not at all phased by her appalled grimace. "What?"

"Seriously? Those flavors don't even go together." Well so much for her vanilla theory. Now she had to wonder what other unconventional tendencies he was harboring under his straight laced facade.

"So? It’s ice cream. ‘Carpe Diem’ and all that good stuff," he explained sagely.

She snickered at his logic. "You don't get ice cream often, do you?"

"No. It's not exactly part of my daily meal plan," he laughed.

They settled on a shaded bench with their sweet treats and Marinette was contentedly amused watching Adrien attack his melting monstrosity while trying desperately to not get it all over his clothes. She giggled between dainty licks of her own cone, pointing out spots to Adrien where drips threatened to escape, studiously ignoring the way his pink tongue peeked out to catch the melting ice cream.

Marinette was not tempted to catch his tongue with hers and suck it into her mouth to taste the sticky sweetness that glistened on his lips.

Nope. Not. At. All.

By the time they finished their ice cream the late afternoon sun was slanting the beginnings of shadows across the ground, turning the sky a palette of cobalt, violet and rose. Marinette hated to put a damper on their good time but she had promised her parents she would be home by sundown, still, she nearly glowed with contentment when Adrian took her hand and insisted on walking her home.

Giving her hand an affectionate squeeze, Adrien offered her a sheepish grin. "I should have told you earlier, you look beautiful today."

She blushed prettily. "Thanks."

"Did you design that outfit yourself?"

"I did," Marinette beamed proudly. It was a simple v-neck blouse with cap sleeves but she'd cut sections along the shoulder, sides and back in a specific pattern and replaced the sheer lilac fabric with cream colored lace. The light denim jeans had the same lace embellishment on the outer seam and pockets. "Making it took forever; between the cutting and the stitching, but I was determined to do it all by hand. I am really happy with how well turned out."

"You've got some serious talent," he stated matter-of-factly. "I mean it. You'll be more famous than my Father one day."

Startled by the honest conviction in Adrien's tone she blinked up at him, wide eyed. "You really think so?"

"I'm just speaking the truth. I wish I was half as talented as you in just one thing that I do." He playfully bumped her shoulder with his, she suspected to lighten the melancholy envy that had crept into his words.

"But you are," she insisted, still Adrien didn't seem convinced. So Marinette had to wonder just how often people gushed his praises as means to an end, to get in his good graces or his father's. She had developed a better understanding now of how lonely he truly was behind his perfected smile but to think that not many people were genuine with him was a down right depressing realization. She silently vowed then and there prove she was not one of those people. "Seriously Adrien; you know Chinese, you play piano and basketball, you're a famous model for goodness sake and you fence. That's pretty amazing if you ask me."

A hint of pink lit his cheeks and she knew he would be rubbing the back if his neck shyly if he had a free hand available. "I've been learning Chinese since kindergarten so it was bound to sink in eventually.  I can play the piano if I have a music sheet to follow but I'm not good enough to compose something. I play basketball mostly for fun. And so what if I can smile in front of a camera and follow directions? It doesn't take skill to pose for pictures.

Adrien sighed, grinning sardonically as he shrugged. "The only thing I'm really good at is fencing and it's taken years of practice with more bruises and blisters than I can count to get to where I am today."

Marinette cocked her head to the side curiously, smiling gently. "Maybe you do your best at fencing because you actually enjoy it."

Adrian's cheeks pinkened even more. "Am I that obvious?"

"You light up when you talk about it. And you get really excited. It makes you happy and it shows," she explained brightly.

Their leisurely pace slowed as they approached the bakery. Reluctantly she released Adrien's hand, an unspoken agreement between them that the less PDA her parents witnessed the better. The bell on the door jingled merrily as they entered the patisserie, waving hello to her parent's as they passed through and headed upstairs.

"Can you stay for a bit or do you have to get home?" Marinette asked, sounding pathetically hopeful as Adrien placed the picnic basket on the kitchen counter.

"I can stay," he replied, taking a seat on the bar stool as she set about unpacking the basket. Her skin tingled with awareness, his jade eyes following her intently as she fluttered about the tiny kitchen, his chin resting on his palm.

As she passed him to put the basket away he pounced with cat-like reflexes and grasped her hand, startling her into dropping the basket as he pulled her close to stand between his bent knees. Raising her hand to his smirking lips, he murmured against her skin, "You know, fencing is not the only thing that makes me happy."

Marinette could literally feel herself melting under the warmth of Adrian's stare as her heart began thundering against her ribs, the butterflies in her stomach abruptly churning into a wave of acute longing. Feeling raw and exposed, she whispered with soul bearing honesty, "You make me happy too."

Adrien's eyes dropped briefly to her lips then lifted to hers again, his intent quite clear even before he sucked in a nervous breath to ask, "May I kiss you?"

And he may as well have pleaded and begged because she could hear the desperation he didn't even try to hide, she felt it in the way he clutched her hand tightly, willing her not to pull away, barely breathing as he waited and hoped for her permission. "Uh-huh, I-I mean- yes p-p-please," she stammered, a mortified blush exploding across her flushed face.

But she couldn't be embarrassed when he leaned in ever so slowly, still giving her time to say no- as if she could get a coherent word out to save her life- his gorgeous face filling her vision until she had to close her eyes and then she felt his lips pressed to hers, gentle but firm and ghosting over hers in a reverent caress.

When Adrien started to lean back Marinette didn't think, she reacted; her hands coming up to frame his face, her fingers threading through his hair as she surged forward to crush her lips against his. Her eagerness caught Adrien off guard and would have sent them both toppling to the floor but his arms snaked around her waist for purchase and she was suddenly pressed flush to his muscular frame, closer than was probably healthy for her racing heart.

Where Adrian's kiss was sweet, her kiss was a damn breaking sending caution and reason tearing away in a flood of long repressed emotions. She was impatient and clumsy but he didn't seem to mind, even when her nose knocked into his he just tilted his head to accommodate, his lips moving just as roughly against hers, his hands fisted into the material of her shirt pressing her even closer.

Marinette cursed the need for oxygen when it forced her to finally pull away, her lips angry and stinging as she panted for air. Her eyes cracked open, peeking to gauge Adrien's expression, and she couldn't hold back her laughter at the completely dazed look on his face. He blinked at her, the corner of his mouth lifting lazily into the dopiest smile she'd ever seen.

"Wow," was all Adrien could say.

And Marinette felt that one word summed it up exactly.

 

* * *

  

Akuma attacks were always a pain in the ass; especially when they happened right smack in the middle of his school.

Literally.

Chat Noir arrived on the scene just as Ladybug ushered the last of his fellow classmates to safety. When the chaos started he’d bolted from class using the crush of students and their confusion to look for Marinette. Once he saw Alya dragging her by the hand out of the front entrance he’d been forced to hide in the boy’s locker room until the halls were clear and as a result he was late to the party.

His partner sauntered up to stand at his side, twirling her yoyo defensively as he surveyed his school’s demolished courtyard. Across the torn up ground, amidst the scattered debris, stood The Cleaner; formerly known as M. Guillot the frazzled janitor. Usually he was a kind man, if a little anal about cleanliness, but now his normally smiling countenance was twisted in an angry grimace, his face cherry red with fury as he waved his shabby broom around threateningly. M. Guillot reminded Chat of a thermometer, the crimson of his bulbous face a stark contrast to the pristine white of his revamped work uniform.

"Bugaboo! We really need to stop meeting like this," Chat greeted, casually draping his wrists over the extended baton slung across his shoulders, assessing the situation with a defiant grin.

"But this is the highlight of my day, Chaton." Ladybug replied sassily, her eyes never leaving the akumatized janitor.

"Oh, well if you need a Chat Noir fix that badly then why didn't you say so. For you, I'd make a house call," he teased shamelessly.

"I was talking about the Akuma," she said flatly.

"Me-owch! You wound me, my Lady."

Ladybug rolled her eyes. "Not as badly as he will if you don't knock it off."

Taking that as his que to step up to the plate, Chat sobered, his silly humor replaced with focused determination as he realigned his baton into a defensive position. "So what's the plan?" 

Now that she had his full attention Ladybug pointed out what she suspected in a low voice. "My guess is the akuma is in his broom. He can use it to create small cyclones that pack the punch of a wrecking ball but he’s fast so we’ll have to be fas-"

Before Ladybug could say more The Cleaner swept his broom against the ground in a wide arc, manic laughter erupting from his sneering mouth as a cyclone flew toward them with unnatural speed. The heroes jumped apart to opposite sides of the courtyard to dodge the attack, barely clearing the outer edge of swirling air before the ground where they had stood a second before exploded into flying chunks of rubble.

Ladybug's eyes met his through the haze of floating dust and she nodded, silently giving him the green light to charge the akuma in his usual ‘no guts, no glory’ style. She readied her yoyo in preparation to take the offensive should he manage to give her an opening.

It was a standard fight, until it wasn't.

Every now and again Chat Noir's bad luck rubbed off on Ladybug and when it did it really threw things for a loop. So when he managed to get hold of The Cleaner's broom and disintegrate it using Cataclysm, he was confident they had the upper hand. But when there was no corrupted akuma escaping from the decaying pieces of the broom, Ladybug paused, confused. Unfortunately that moment of belated realization was an opening The Cleaner didn't hesitate to take.  Out of thin air he produced a duster and pointed it like a wand right at Ladybug. Chat screamed her name in a desperate bid to warn her but it was too late, a concentrated gust of air slammed right into his partner’s chest, the impact sending her slight form hurtling head first into the school's brick wall.

When Ladybug crumpled to the ground in a red and black spotted heap, Chat swore his heart stopped. Driven by fearful adrenaline, he moved faster than he ever had in his life, scooping up Ladybug’s limp body into his arms and vaulting them into the air in mere seconds, narrowly missing another blast from The Cleaner. He didn’t stop until they were a safe distance away and out of plain sight on a secluded rooftop; and only then did he sink to his knees cradling Ladybug against his chest, sheer panic nearly getting the better of him.

Frantically he felt for a pulse, the gut wrenching fear easing when he felt it thrumming strong and steady beneath his fingertips. "Come on LB," he pleaded desperately, shaking her shoulder easily, "Wake up. Please wake up." But the girl in his arms remained still, breathing evenly.

True to his black luck, Chat's ring beeped.

Shit! He'd almost forgotten he used Cataclysm. Plagg needed a snack and quick but he couldn't leave Ladybug; he'd never abandon her when she was at her most vulnerable. But Ladybug could wake up any second and she would not be happy to meet Chat's civilian self. Or she might not wake up for hours. Dare he take that chance?

There really wasn't a choice.

Well, if he was going to take a risk then he may as well go all the way. "Plagg! Claws in!"

In a flash of green light the cat suit disappeared and Adrien grimaced, feeling entirely too exposed. Plagg deliberately fell to the roof, the image of utter exhaustion as he dramatically groaned. "So hungry..."

"Here." Adrien reached in his pocket for a chunk of wrapped cheese for Plagg and accidentally pulled out his lucky charm as well. Clutching the beaded leather in his fist, Adrien sent out a silent plea to any higher power there may be to please let Ladybug be alright and get them out of this tricky situation, preferably without his partner pissed off at him for recklessly revealing himself. He glared at Plagg when the kwami hummed in delight. "Will you please hurry up!"

"I'm... going as.... fast... as I... can..." Plagg garbled between bites as Adrien continued watch Ladybug's face anxiously, searching for any sign she might be stirring. After a few tense moments Plagg warned, "I'm not fully juiced up, kid. I can't promise how long I'll hold up. You definitely can't use Cataclysm again or I'll be drained completely."

"No Cataclysm, got it."

"And no screwing around, I mean it. Wake her up and get this done. I need a long nap and two wheels of camembert."

"Could you… I don’t know, maybe not worry about cheese right now!" Adrien hissed.

Plagg shot him a fanged smile. "You worry about akumas, I worry about cheese. That was the deal."

"And what if she doesn't wake up?" Adrien asked, but no sooner had the question left his lips when Ladybug's fingers twitched and her head shifted slightly. His panicked gaze flew to the little black kwami. "Plagg, Claws out!”

The burst of green light faded just as Ladybug opened her eyes.

 

* * *

 

Chat Noir’s worried face was the first thing Ladybug’s fuzzy brain focused on. The second was the splitting headache that started throbbing throughout her entire skull, pounding along with each beat of her heart. The third was that she was practically siting in her partner’s lap with his arms wrapped protectively around her.

Blushing furiously, Ladybug scrambled to get out of the compromising position but her head had other ideas and she blinked against a wave of dizziness and swayed right back into Chat’s arms. When the silly kitty failed to make a teasing jibe, she chanced looking up and was immediately taken back by the blatant relief and affection that shined from his weak grin.

“How are you feeling?” he asked concerned, “Any double vision? Nausea?”

“No, just my head is killing me.” She frowned. “How long was I out?”

“Ten minutes, maybe.” Chat helped her adjust her position so that she was sitting beside him instead of on him. He cupped her face in his hands, gently tilting it this way and that, searching for damage. She gasped and winced when his clawed glove found the sizable knot near the back of her head. “At least it swelled out and not in. Fuck, LB… when you went down I don’t think I’ve ever been so scared in my life. I thought he’d broken your neck or something. If anything happened to you…”

It wasn’t so much what Chat said but how he said it that caused Ladybug’s heart to swell. For so long she’d brushed off his supposed affections as a joke, but this wasn’t teasing or flirting. His voice was raw with the fear that still lingered in his words and his touch was respectful and comforting. This was Chat, but this was also the boy behind the mask and she would have had to be blind and deaf not to recognize the love that poured out of him.

Genuine love…

For her.

Feeling strong enough to push herself despite her massive headache, Ladybug reached up and scratched Chat under his chin, smiling bravely, “You would never let anything happen to me and I’d bet my life on that any time, anywhere.”

“You would do the same for me,” he replied, grinning brightly. “I’m just so glad you’re okay.”

“I'm a lucky lady bug,” she laughed wryly. “Out of the suit, though, not so much.” She arched a brow curiously when Chat began patting around his lap, looking for something.

“Ah-hah!” he crowed, perking up as he held his closed fist out to her. “Here, this might bring you some luck when duty isn’t calling.”

For a long moment Ladybug stared at the red, green and gold charm he dropped onto her palm. It was mind-numbing shock that kept the quizzical smile glued to her face as she asked softly, “Where did you get this?”

She didn’t need to ask. She knew exactly where he’d gotten it. Still, part of her begged for a different answer.

“A friend gave it to me,” Chat offered with a shrug. “She said it would help and it did.”

Ladybug remembered that moment, months ago, and now as she looked at Chat she was seeing another boy with the same sun-kissed hair, the same magnanimous disposition and the same eager smile. A boy that was dating her to get over someone else- She stopped that train of thought right in its tracks. Emotions were building, churning and threatening to break the barrier of her shock, but now wasn’t the time. Ladybug had to focus.

“Don't you think you should hold onto it? You are a black cat after all,” she teased, but the words sounded hollow to her ears.

Chat’s cheeks turned pink beneath his mask. “Nah, I got something better.”

That’s right. Why would he need this stupid trinket when he had Ladybug?

“It was given to you. Keep it,” she insisted firmly, hoping he didn’t hear the crack in her voice as she placed the beaded cord back in his hand and closed his fingers around it. “I appreciate it though. Thanks Chat.”

“Alright.” He cocked his head in a familiar cat-like way. “You sure you’re okay?”

“Yeah,” she scrubbed a hand over her eyes, swallowing hard against the burn in her throat as she rose to her feet. “Nothing my Miraculous Cure won’t fix. Come on Kitty, we need to finish this.”  

“Lead the way, my Lady.”

In minutes the superheroes were back to the school and ready to kick akuma butt. Round two went far more smoothly, Chat attacking so aggressively that he managed to get his paws on the janitor’s cap, the only part of The Cleaner’s uniform that wasn’t spotless, and free the akuma. Ladybug swung her yoyo and de-evilized the little butterfly, sending the purified akuma on its way. She didn’t even have to use Lucky Charm so she threw her yoyo into the air and released Miraculous Cure, her throbbing headache fading away to a minor twinge as swirls of lady bugs repaired all the damage that surrounded them.

Chat held out his fist and she bumped it, going through the motions while trying to keep her mind as blank as possible. When his ring beeped she almost sighed in relief.

“That’s my que. Later, Bugaboo!” Giving her a two finger salute and a cocky smirk, Chat pole-vaulted onto the nearest rooftop and in a streak of black was gone from sight.

With a halfhearted wave to the amassing crowd, she slung her yoyo and flew into the air. She knew she should change back and return to school. The fight had taken up most of the lunch hour but now that all was well class would resume as normal. But there was no way in hell she could deal with Ad- Alya and the rest of her classmates. She needed to be alone. Taking the roundabout way back to the bakery, she was as quiet as a mouse as she entered her bedroom through her skylight door.       

Ladybug hated the way the tears started as soon as the door clicked closed, but she couldn’t hold them back any longer. She stumbled down the step ladder, wracking sobs shaking her slim shoulders as she pressed a hand to her mouth to keep from making a sound. There was no one here to hide herself from, not even Tikki and she didn’t bother to release the transformation. She just needed to let the hurt bleed out; she didn’t need Tikki’s pity.  

Or Adrien’s.

Was that why Adrien had decided to go on a date with her; because he pitied pathetic little stuttering, blushing, clumsy, wallflower Marinette?  What other reason could there be? Adrien Agreste was in love with Ladybug and Marinette Dupin-Cheng was certainly no basis for comparison.

Her heart twisted viciously as the full impact of the revelation hit her. She’d been right in front of him all along and not once had Adrien ever looked at Marinette the way Chat looked at Ladybug; like she was the most precious thing in his universe.

Catching her reflection in her vanity mirror, she stared at her tear streaked face, blotchy and puffy and as red as her spotted mask. What would he think of Ladybug if he could see her now? Would he still be in love? Would he still feel the same if he knew that she was a complete fraud under the mask?

That was a fair question. Did her feelings for Adrien change now that she knew his secret? Of course not, but she’d always cared about Chat too. She hadn’t been in love with him but he was her best friend. To find out they were one in the same… that was some luck.

But Adrien had never cared about Marinette. Hell, before she gave him that stupid letter he barely knew she existed. He was only giving her a chance because being with Marinette was better than nothing. And that was exactly what the truth would leave her with. She wouldn’t just lose her delusional relationship with Adrien, she would also lose the easy friendship she had with Chat.

Maybe not yet, but what was going to happen once he realize that she knew the truth? It would be like a slap in the face; that after all the fuss she’d made about keeping their identities a secret she was the one to figure it out. He could very well be angry, and honestly she wouldn’t blame him. He had so much more to lose than she did.

Unless…

Unless Chat never found out that she knew he was really Adrien Agreste.

She didn’t like the idea of lying, she really, really didn’t; but if it came down to losing Adrien or losing Chat… she’d choose her best friend over the boy just using her as a rebound.

In the heavy silence her earrings beeped.

Her eyes shifted from the mirror to the picture of Adrien on her desk. He was so beautiful it hurt to breathe, it hurt so damn much, but she always knew he was too good to be true. And it would be so much easier if she could blame him but it wasn’t his fault. He’d been honest from the beginning and he’d told her he loved someone else. She couldn’t hold that against him. But she could blame herself because it was Marinette’s fault that she wasn’t as awesome outside of the suit as she was in it.  It was her fault that he loved the idea of someone that didn’t really exist.

So if she broke things off with Adrien, she would be doing him a favor, right?

Her miraculous beeped again.

And maybe, just maybe, she’d be lucky enough to keep Adrien as a friend once she was truly over him.  And she could hope for his sake that one day he’d meet a girl who could put Ladybug to shame.

There was lead in her feet as walked over to the desk and a trembling in her hands as she picked up the framed picture. If letting Adrien go was the only way to keep him then she could do it. She would do it, no matter how much it broke her heart. She put his picture away in the bottom drawer with all of her other keepsakes, thankful that was the only picture she had left of him in her room. It would be easier to make a clean break and big part of that would be removing him from all unnecessary parts of her life, at least for now.

The tears were not going to stop and her body was drained, even her head was beginning to hurt again. Sniffling, she crawled up the steps to her loft bed and burrowed into the blankets, curling around her kitty pillow and clinging to it as if it were her only life line. She didn’t care when her earrings beeped for the final time or when the bright red light traveled down her body. She pulled her cellphone from her purse, ignoring the two messages from Adrien and tapped out a text to Alya explaining that she was at home and not feeling well. That would give her tonight to get her act together and she would deal with the rest tomorrow.

But Marinette’s tears started coming harder when Tikki settled on the pillow and nuzzled into her shoulder, nibbling on her large cookie as she patted her charge comfortingly.

“Tikki?"

"Yes?"

"You've been around a long time... How do I make myself stop loving him?" she whispered brokenly.

"Oh Marinette. Love doesn't work that way. But trust me, it will get better with time and it will hurt less. You just have to be patient.” Tikki promised, but despite her sympathy she added, “He deserves to know. You should tell him the truth."

"I can't, not now." She didn’t need to elaborate, Tikki already understood.

"But Marinette, he loves you."

She squeezed her eyes shut, not wanting to remember the adoration on Chat’s face. "No, he loves Ladybug."

"And you are Ladybug." Tikki countered patiently, as if it were really that simple.

"When I wear the suit I'm a leader but it's not the real me-” Tikki made a noise of protest and she amended, “-okay, not entirely me. And its those other parts, the insecurities and the fears that I can’t pretend aren’t there.” Her voice wavered as she admitted the most hurtful part. “He has the real me and he still loves her. He gave her the good luck charm I gave him. It meant so little to him, I mean so little to him, that he would just give it away.”

"I think you're looking at it wrong-"

"I don't compare to Ladybug, Tikki. I never did. And I can't be his consolation prize. I just can't!" she cried, curling in on herself even more because hearing the words out loud made them irrevocably real.

Tikki frowned. "Adrien should know the truth and have some time to understand how he feels. Then you can both talk this through make a decision together. That is what partners do."

"No Tikki.” Marinette wiped her eyes, sniffling. “I couldn't take seeing his disappointment. Ladybug's identity is the only part of me that I have left to give but it's also mine to keep if that’s what I choose."

"I'd say you've made your choice,” the little kwami sighed sadly. “Are you sure about this? You are not the only one at risk of getting hurt."

Marinette’s heart tore just a little more as she gave voice the one truth that held bearing over all the rest.

"Adrian doesn’t love me. He'll be just fine."

* * *

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A.N. – Oh why, oh why do I love torturing our little cinnamon rolls so much? Because there was too much fluff and the angst had to come, like the calm before the storm. So now that Marinette is about to make a grand mess of things, let’s all drown our sorrows with ice cream! Who’s with me?
> 
> Also I would like to point out that any discrepancies you see between my stories and the series (such as in this fic where Marinette is a quarter Chinese instead of half) are more than likely intentional and we’ll just chalk it up to artistic license. I’m not going to mess with anything that actually changes key factors, if I do then it will be labeled as an AU.
> 
> As always, you guys are the best! Thanks for reading.


	4. In which Adrien isn’t okay, Plagg is captain obvious, DJ/Wi-Fi = #friendshipgoals

**All The Things You Said**

**By:**  Lara Winner

DISCLAIMER: I do not own the Miraculous Series

 

* * *

 

 

Marinette was avoiding him.

After the akuma attack two days prior she hadn't returned to class. Concerned, Adrien had messaged her inquiring about her wellbeing but she never responded to his texts. Alya had to inform him that Marinette was not feeling well and as a result was going to remain home. He sent Marinette another text telling her hoped she felt better, but again there was no response. He told himself not to worry, that she would contact him when she was feeling up to it.

Then Marinette was absent from school the next day as well. He was prepared to ditch fencing practice so he could stop by the bakery and check in on her but another relayed message from Alya assured him that Marinette would be returning to school the next day. He tried not to take it personally that Marinette couldn't be bothered to text her boyfriend-

Well... He knew what role he'd like to play in her life but they hadn't exactly put a label on whatever was happening between them.

Adrien had hoped to get the chance to talk to her today but she was ten minutes late for homeroom. As she passed his seat her eyes had briefly slid to meet his and something in that all too brief glance left ice shards in his heart, cold and painful. He may be socially oblivious to a slew of things but Adrien knew _that_ look; the shifting of the eyes, the downward tilt of the lips and completely closed expression that screamed emptiness. He'd only seen it carved in stone of his father's countenance every day and the unexpectedness of it made Marinette seem like a stranger, apathetic and distant.

It was wrong in an unsettling way and Adrien desperately told himself he was overreacting, that she'd had a bad morning and he wasn't about to lose the best thing that had happened to him in recent years.

But the desperate self-assurance died a quick death when Marinette bolted from the class room as soon as the bell rang, purposely avoiding his gaze and keeping a wide berth between them. It was the same when he passed her in the crowded halls; she seemed to hunch in on herself as if trying to become invisible whenever their paths would cross and sidestepping him as far as possible.

By the time the final bell rang Adrien was a ball of distracted nerves determined to get some answers.

"Marinette, wait!" he called out, rushing to catch up with the tiny girl. Clutching the strap of his satchel as if it would keep him grounded, he asked worriedly, "Are you mad at me? You've been avoiding me for the last two days."

Marinette didn't stop speed walking nor did she look up, keeping her eyes down and her shoulders hunched. "I'm not mad, Adrien."

Okay...

"Did I do something wrong?" He wracked his brain, trying to think of anything that had been unusual, anything that he could possibly have screwed up, but nothing was standing out. "If I did tell me, please..." he begged, shouldering past his fellow students in order kept up with the practically jogging Marinette.

"Look, it's not you it's me-"

Her use of the classic break-up line stung like a slap in the face.

“Seriously?” he snapped, cutting off her lame excuse. Done with Marinette’s escape tactics, Adrien grasped her wrist pulling her to an ungraceful stop, his hands settling on her upper arms to keep her from bolting. His blond brows were drawn into a harsh frown, annoyance borne of the raging panic twisting his insides, darkened his impossibly perfect face. "I'm sorry, okay. Whatever I did I'll fix it, I promise. Just talk to me," he cried desperately.

"I... t-this..." Marinette stumbled over her words with a pained grimace, "It i-isn't going to work. Trust me, it’s better this way." Her voice was steady, dispassionate even, as she offered a reason that only prompted more questions. Pulling away from his lax hold, the glassy moisture in her baby blues was another disparaging find but perhaps the most genuine. "Please... I have to go," she muttered, flinching away when he tried to catch her hand, stumbling back. "Don't please..."

And then she was running, books clutched to her chest, purse bouncing against her hip with every pounding step as she raced across the front steps. "Marinette!" He called out, but she didn't stop and a moment later was out of sight.

"Fuck!" Adrien hissed under his breath.

Pulling out his phone, he sent a text to the one person who was sure to know exactly what the hell was going on.

{What's up with Marinette?}

Alya: {I was kinda hoping you could tell me.}

{I have no idea. She won't talk to me. She won't tell me what I did. I don't know what to do.}

Alya: {You need to calm down. I'll deal with Marinette. It will be okay}

{Thanks}

But despite his friend's reassurance Adrien wasn't going to get his hopes up. Rubbing the back of his neck, an agitated habit, he shuffled his feet toward the boy’s locker room. It was probably a good thing his free time had been rescheduled with fencing practice. The regional meet was in two weeks and D'argencourt was expecting excellence.

So was his father...

Not that Gabriel Agreste could be bothered to attend.

With a helpless sigh Adrien tapped out one more text, this time to the petite girl turning his head and his heart upside down.

(I'm sorry)

Adrien still wasn't sure what he was apologizing for but maybe if he seemed contrite enough Marinette would tell him.

Five hours, one rigorous gym session and nine deleted texts later, Adrien was not just physically exhausted but emotionally as well. Fresh from his shower with damp hair and shiny skin, Adrien sat cross legged in the center of his massive bed staring down at the smart phone in his hands- if it was really so damn smart it would tell him what to do- as he tried to phrase yet another text to Marinette, one that he was determined to send this time. He about jumped out of his skin when the phone chimed and vibrated in his nervous grip.

Alya: {She needs space}

Well he’d gotten that message loud and clear when Marinette had quite literally run away from him earlier that afternoon. The more he thought back on it the more obvious it was that she had been on the verge of losing it. She’d put up a good front, had almost convinced him that she was completely removed from the entire situation, but the unshed tears welling in her eyes had been the giveaway. And the memory tore at him, driving him to push himself harder than necessary at the gym until his muscles and burned and ached to the point of forcing away the image of her teary eyes. But even the physical discomfort didn’t ease his guilt at hurting her.

{I figured that. Did she say why?}

He hoped Alya had the answer.

Alya: {Just that it's better to end it now instead of later. She's convinced that whatever is happening between you guys is going to end badly.}

 _End it now_ …

Oh.

 _End it now_ …

She didn’t want space.

 _End it now_ …

She wanted him gone.

 _End it now_ …

Adrien stared at those three little words until his eyes began to blur, his throat aching as he swallowed hard. It was to be expected, really. He wasn’t surprised. He wasn’t even angry. Those emotions were for people who anticipated a happy ending and had it cruelly snatched away. But he knew better.

Good things didn’t happen to him.

Beautiful girls with the stars in their eyes and world at their feet couldn’t love someone like him.

Someone who destroyed everything he touched, who drove away everyone he loved.

It didn’t matter how badly he wanted Marinette to be different, or that he’d only had the best of intentions when it came to her feelings. He was what he was meant to be; undeserving and alone.

He didn’t blame Marinette; he needed Alya to know that.   

{I just wanted to make her happy.}

His friend’s response was swift and true.

Alya: {If I thought this was something you caused I'd have kicked your ass by now. She's stubborn when she thinks she's right.}

Of course Marinette was right to walk away.

{If that's what she wants then please tell her I won't bother her anymore.}

Alya: {You're a good guy Adrien. Give her time. I'm sure she'll come around.}

No she wouldn’t. He’d been down this road more times than any one person should and he knew exactly where it would lead. It was cold and lonely but at least it was familiar. He’d manage. He always did.

Something inside of Adrien broke.

He didn’t recognize the wounded cry that ripped from his throat. Nor did he remember consciously making the decision to move but there he was on his feet, chest heaving as if he couldn’t breathe with his phone thrown across the room and littering the floor in pieces just few feet from where it had hit the wall.

Pressing his palms into his eyes, hard enough to see bright spots dancing on the back of his eyelids, he nearly flinched when Plagg’s tiny paw patted his cheek comfortingly.

"Kid, you gonna be okay?"

There was no point in lying.

"No," he whispered, but he could be. He just needed to get back to that place where noting could reach him; not foolish hope, not debilitating love and not even the void of isolation.  

"Plagg! Claws out!"

Leaping from his window and out into the darkness of the night, Chat Noir ran.

 

* * *

 

 

To say the last six days had been hell would be the understatement of the year.

Marinette watered the flowers that adorned her terrace on autopilot, the noon sun garishly bright compared to her mood as her mind wandered over the past week. It was safe to say she’d been stuck in a cycle of regret and longing. She woke up. She cried. She went to school. She cried in the girl’s bathroom between classes. She came home and hid in her room. She cried until it was time to sleep. Tikki was worried but Marinette waved away her kwami‘s concern. She was pretty sure she didn’t deserve it.

It was hard to stand by her decision when her heart was not truly in it. The love she felt for Adrien was not going to go away just because she willed it to. Her heart begged and pleaded, trying to convince her that being second best was better than being alone but her damnable pride would not let her cave. And when her pride faltered she would consider the consequences of revealing herself; imagine the disappointment that Adrien would surely try to hide once he realized that Ladybug had been nothing more than a glorified lie all along.

Still, she saw him every day at school and it was… hard. She did her best to stay out of Adrien’s way but his neutral expression would turn sullen the moment he caught sight of her and the guilt would crush her lungs, the desire to bury herself in his arms almost overwhelming and she would force herself to look away lest he see emotional mess that she barely kept contained.  Her only reprieve had been the weekend where she had paced her bedroom out of restless agitation and dutifully answered Alya’s text messages to deter her friend from getting the bright idea to visit.

Adrien, on the other hand, seemed to be taking things fairly well. For the most part he was his usual self, laughing at things Nino would say and engaging in the playful banter he and Alya shared without missing a beat. Alya said he promised to leave her alone and he had made good on his word; not a single text or phone call, hell not even a word spoken to her in the past four days. Adrien wouldn’t even look her way in home room. But in the halls, when they passed each other by chance, that was when she suspected he might not be as okay as he seemed. When he thought she wasn’t watching he would let his guard down and he when he did he looked so tired, just completely drained.

It had been thoughtless to assume that Adrien wouldn’t be hurt by her sudden rejection. And even if Marinette was doing this for greater good of their friendship and partnership, a rejection was still a rejection no matter what the reason. Every time she caught a glimpse of Adrien’s funk she felt guilty for that too, horribly so.       

But it was for the best. She just had to keep telling herself that.

Thankfully the week had been Akuma free. Seeing Adrien was a trying enough; Marinette was not ready to don the suit yet. Ladybug was going to need more than her trademark luck to face Chat Noir without falling apart and giving herself away.

And because Marinette wasn’t in the spotted suit with luck oozing out of her ears, it was hardly a surprise when Chat Noir found her.

_You think of the alley cat and then he shows up…_

The lanky teen vaulted from the neighboring roof and onto the terrace landing in a crouch, his ears flicked forward and tail angrily lashing to and fro.

Even though she knew his secret, it was too ingrained to think of Chat Noir and Adrien Agreste as different people, so she didn't try and rectify the inclination. It was better to get this meeting over and done, especially since there was only one reason Chat would seek out her civilian self.

Setting down the watering can, so as not to drop it from the sudden trembling that had taken hold of her hands, Marinette turned to the disguised hero with what she hoped was a mild expression. "So… What brings you doing here, Chat?"

"Do I need an excuse to see my favorite Princess?" He teased with expected flair but his familiar exuberance was missing, like a bold flame that had been smothered to only the tiniest flicker remained.

Unlike Marinette and the trouble she had discerning Adrien's true feelings, Ladybug knew her partner almost as well as she knew herself and right now Chat was putting on a good show. But that's all it was, just a show; because she could see the way his grin was tight and practiced and his cheerful tone did not inspire the same sentiment to sparkle in his eyes.

In return, Marinette's pitiful attempt at a smile was just as forced, her words an outright accusation. "It would be a first if you didn't."

"No need to hiss. I'm not your enemy." Chat chided softly, his hands raised in supplication as he sauntered forward the lean against the iron balustrade. "You're right though. A mutual friend asked me to check in on you and see if you were okay. They're really worried about you," he admitted, oddly somber as he folded his arms across his chest.

"As you can see I'm perfectly fine," she lied.

"Give me a little credit, Princess. I may be a kid having fun in a magical cat costume, but I'm not a total idiot. And you have a crappy poker face. You're not purr-fectly fine, even I can see that. So what gives?"

There was a mixture of derisiveness and concern woven through his instigative observation and it was very disconcerting to glimpse Adrien's inner turmoil seeping through the cracks of the ever self-assured and jovial Chat Noir.

Just something else Marinette could blame herself for.

Chat deserved some kind of explanation, something better than a vague 'it’s better this way', she knew that. So she settled on a version of the truth that would at least let him know it wasn't his fault and never had been.

"There's some personal stuff I need to figure out, things I need to get my head around." That wasn't a lie, just maybe not the whole truth. "I didn't mean to worry anyone or hurt anyone's feelings. It's my problem, no one else’s." Dare she call him out and let him know he wasn't the sly kitty he thought he was? Giving Chat a pointed look, she sighed. "Tell Adrien I'm really sorry. I'll find a way to make it up to him somehow."

Chat blinked. "How did you know...?"

"Of course it's Adrien," she scoffed, flashing him fond smile that was shrouded with sadness. "He's always been a far better friend to me than I've been to him. I know he means well but he can't help me with this."

"I don't know if he would agree with that but I'll pass on the message," Chat replied, his head tilting as he contemplated her brittle stance and fragile composure. His expression gentled as his arms fell from their defensive position and he lifted one clawed hand entreatingly. "Is there anything I can do?"

Why did he have to be so kind?

Marinette sucked in a breath, blinking at the sudden moisture in her eyes and fighting against every instinct that urged her to close the meager distance between them. Instead she clasped her hand behind her back so she wouldn't end up doing something stupid.

Her voice wobbled right along with her smile. "No. But thanks for offering."

Before Chat could say anything more Sabine's voice drifted up from the open sky light.

"Marinette, your lunch is getting cold!"

Both teens started, Chat looking away as Marinette breathed a silent sigh of relief.

"Coming, Maman!"

Mustering up a cheeky grin that was a weak comparison to his normal megawatt smile, Chat hopped up onto the balcony railing balancing on the balls of his feet as he crouched in preparation to leap. "Guess that's my que to make like a stray and scram." He gave her a two finger salute. "Later, Princess."

"Later, Chat." With a heavy heart Marinette watched as her partner took to the rooftops and within seconds he had disappeared from sight.   

 

* * *

 

  

"Allez!"

At the command Adrien began the advance with a lunge, parrying his opponent’s sabre before making a feint to the right and another lunge before the other boy could gain his bearings. He was particularly aggressive today, continuously on the offensive and refusing to let up for even a second. Fencing was as much strategy as it was muscle memory and Adrien could execute the moves in his sleep.

D’argencourt blew his whistle bringing the practice match to a halt. 

"That was sloppy!" The coach stalked over, realigning Adrien’s arm with a thwack on the bicep from his sabre and then did the same to his left leg with a sharp rap to his shin, finally satisfied when his pupil stood with rigid form. He nodded stiffly. “Focus Monsieur Agreste!”

Infuriated, Adrien bit the inside of his cheek as he quelled the uncharacteristic desire to punch the stuffy coach right in his cheesy mustache.

"You must be flawless. Again!" D’argencourt demanded as both boys assumed en garde. At the mark they began another round of lunges and parries and ripostes and feints only to be stopped by the dreaded whistle once more.

"Your attacks are weak and your feints are predictable,” D’argencourt wailed dramatically before leveling Adrien with a withering glare as he barked, “and your form is disgraceful!” Pinching the bridge of his nose in abject frustration, he squeezed his eyes shut and waved the both boys away with a swipe his sabre through the air. “Go hit the equipment. I expect your heads to be cleared when you both set foot on my strip again. Dismissed!"

Adrien stalked furiously to the boy’s locker room, ripping his face guard off with unnecessary force as he approached his locker. He wasn’t sure who he was more irritated with, D’argencourt and his pretentious coaching tactics or himself for allowing this thing with Marinette mess with his head so badly. The reprimands he received today were not entirely uncalled for; he hadn’t done his best because his mind was distracted.  But did the asshat really have to act like he was an unredeemable noob with no skill what so ever?   

Muttering colorful curses under his breath and embracing the undignified behavior that was frowned upon by his father- but was far more satisfying than just ignoring his emotions- he stripped out of his fencing gear and into his gym sweats as his blood simmered. The agitation had been building ever since his masked visit with Marinette earlier that day and his temper was frayed to the snapping point. He hated feeling like he wasn’t in control of himself and he certainly didn’t enjoy having to mind his tongue lest he lash out at those around him by saying things he didn’t mean. That was his father’s coping method; bury all emotion until the slightest provocation caused an eruption of both frigid anger and ruthless insults.

Adrien wasn’t exactly proud that he had his father’s temper; so he made sure that he found alternate ways of purging it. Running was his go to method, one of the may reason he loved being Chat Noir, but sometimes racing across rooftops wasn’t practical. Physical workouts were equally as effective and Adrien made use of the weight room, pushing himself until everything from his neck down burned as his limbs throbbed along with his heartbeat.

Drenched in sweat, thoroughly exhausted and slightly queasy, Adrien stumbled back to the changing room barely making it to his locker before his shaky legs refused to hold him up any longer. He slumped down on the bench finally realizing that the sky through the window was dark and it was much later than he thought. Checking the time on his new cell phone confirmed that his workout session had run over two hours. 

"Kid, you can't keep this up," Plagg admonished, floating up from Adrien’s duffel bag to give the teen a squinty-eyed glare.

Adrien ducked his head, running a hand through his damp hair. "Not now, Plagg."

The kwami ignored him. "When was the last time you ate something?"

"Yesterday… maybe?” Adrien shrugged. “I don't know. I'm not hungry."

"You haven't been sleeping either." Plagg pointed out.

"I'm fine." Adrien insisted, trying not to be annoyed by Plagg’s concern. All the same, he was in no mood to sit through a sarcastic lecture on basic human functions from a cat-like god that was definitely not human.

"If you're fine then I'm a dog."

"Well whaddaya know,” Adrien snapped, “guess I’ll start calling you Bingo."

"Watch it!” Plagg warned grumpily. “There isn't enough camembert in the world to get me to put up with you being a smart ass."

"Speaking of cheese, can't you go find some and leave me alone," Adrien sighed as he tapped out a text to Nathalie explaining that he was done with practice for tonight. He checked to for missed messages, knowing better than to get his hopes up. There was one from Alya and two from Nino but none from Marinette. And even though he knew there wouldn’t be, his stomach still dropped in disappointment.

The tiny kwami continued to stare his charge down, nonplussed. "You're not okay."

"I know." Adrien agreed hollowly, thinking that Plagg's observation fell quite a bit short of the truth. He was done. With everything. Just fucking done.

"You should talk to someone."

Adrien recoiled from the idea, rolling his eyes. "There's only one person I want to talk to and until she stops shutting me out like I don't exist I've got nothing."

Plagg cocked his head curiously, a tiny paw rubbing his chin in thoughtful consideration. "Maybe you need another girl's perspective," he offered, then clapped his paws together excitedly. "I know! Why not talk to Ladybug?"

Adrien gaped incredulously at his kwami for a full minute before finally barking out a sarcastic laugh. "Yeah, so not gonna happen."

"Why not? Bugsy's got smarts. I bet she could help you."

"No. I mean it. There is no way in hell I'm explaining Marinette to Ladybug. Not a chance."

Electric green clashed with polished jade, glaring stubbornly.

"No Plagg."

"You got a better idea? Because in case you haven't noticed, keeping it all bottled up isn't working out so well." Plagg growled, folding his arms and he getting right in Adrien's face, nose to nose so the teen had to cross his eyes to keep from looking away. "All you're doing is making yourself sick and not getting anywhere."

Adrien knew Plagg was right. Recklessly pushing himself past his limits was unhealthy and would only be detrimental in the long run. The temporary pain and exhaustion only distracted him from his mixed up emotions but did absolutely nothing to help him get a grip on the situation. It was obvious he couldn't keep going like this. Adrien just really hated to admit to Plagg that he was right.

“You're not going to let this go are you?"

"Nooooope," the feline kwami sing-songed, turning upside down as he glided out of Adrien's personal space with a fanged smirk. "I'll just keep annoying you until you follow my excellent advice."

"I'll think about what you said, okay," Adrien relented with a fair amount of reluctance, wincing at his screaming muscles when he stood. As he headed for the showers, he gave Plagg a pointed stare. "But I'm not promising anything. Now go suck down some cheese and shut it."

 

* * *

 

 

"Yo Marinette, you got a minute?"

After a full week of charged silences and avoidance between Adrien and herself, Marinette was expecting this conversation. Although she had assumed it would be with Alya at their favorite cafe and not with Nino during study hour in the library; but hey, fate was funny like that.

"Sure Nino," she replied in a hushed tone, motioning for her friend to have a seat. "Everything okay?"

"Not really," he answered as he spun his chair around backward and flopped down, folding his arms across the back to rest his chin. "What's up with giving my bro the cold shoulder? That's harsh don't ya think?" he asked, though not unkindly and without the acerbic sting to his accusation that she felt was well deserved.

"It's not- I don't- ugh!" Marinette groaned, dramatically dropping her head onto her open text book. "It's complicated."

And that was really the source of the entire problem. It was hard enough being an emotional teenager and having a massive crush on a boy that only considered you a friend; but toss in superhero duties and secret identities and a love- square was the best way she could sum it up- a love square that she couldn't explain to anyone because of the whole secret thing...

It seriously sucked.

Nino must have been able to read her expression because he reached over and patted her head sympathetically. "I don't need the deets. I just hate seeing my best dudes bummed out, ya know."

Marinette understood. If positions were reversed and it was Alya and Nino on the outs she would totally meddle and try to help them in any way she could. They looked out for each other no matter what and that was why she loved her fiends so dearly. Now, if she could just figure out how to get Adrien back into the friend zone then all would be well in their little circle once more.

Of course if she'd just left well enough alone to begin with...

"I never should have told him how I felt," she confessed, frowning as she sat up and propped her chin on her palm, the history assignment she'd been working on all but forgotten.

"Why? It looked like things were going great for you guys."

"It was." But Ladybug had all the luck, not Marinette, and that was exactly why she should have known it couldn't last. "Like I said, it's complicated."

"That might be enough of an explanation for Alya and me but don't ya think Adrien deserves to know why you broke it off with him? Especially since it was totally outta left field and shit."

Adrien deserved more than just the truth. He deserved a partner who wasn't afraid of her own potential, who could own up to her flaws and compensate for them and the fact that she couldn't bring herself to take those risks said everything.

"I don't know how to explain it to him," _without destroying his perception of Ladybug_ , she added silently.

"Anything would be better than nothing, right?" With a quick glance around to make sure no one was within earshot, Nino leaned closer whispering conspiratorially, "Adrien would probably be pissed I'm telling you this but he's miserable and he crazy misses you and he'd be able to deal better if he just knew why." Unable to help it, the traitorous tears that had been her constant companion for the last week decided to visit as her heart twisted at Nino's words. Seeing her genuinely upset, Nino panicked. "Shit! Don't cry Marinette, please."

Suspecting Adrien was hiding the depth of his feelings from her was one thing, but having it confirmed by the one person he would confide in made her feel like such a heartless bitch.

Swiping at her eyes, Marinette leaned back in her seat and ignored her friend's placating gestures. "You think I don't know that I hurt him?" She asked, her voice cracking. "Believe me, it's hurting me too. But this is the only way that Adrien and I can hopefully be friends again at some point."

Nino was baffled by her logic. "So now you want to be just friends? But Adrien is like head over heels for you. Isn't that what you wanted?"

It was what she wanted, more than anything, and Nino knew it. He certainly didn't need to rub it in, even if he was just trying to be helpful.

"Adrien doesn't love me. Why would you say that?" she asked between sniffs, affronted by his carelessness.

"Um, cuz it's totally freakin' obvious." Picking up on her disgruntled cluelessness Nino began painting the bigger picture in his uniquely matter-of-fact way. "You're all he talks about. And he was happy with you, like really happy, for like the first time since I've met him. You know his Dad is a shithead and never there so as his friends you, me and Alya are all he's got. But then you became waaay more. I figured you knew it."

But Nino couldn't be right. There was no way the boy Marinette loved would return her feelings and she... she- what, just didn't notice? The very idea was ridiculous. Of course she'd know something that important.

 _Just like you knew Adrien was Chat Noir_ , her mind taunted snidely.

Okay, so maybe observation wasn't one of her super powers. But still...

"If what you're saying is true then why didn't he tell me?" she asked stiffly.

"Did you give him the chance?"

Had she?

Considering that their relationship was only just starting to progress beyond the boundaries of friendship, she couldn’t exactly expect Adrien to gush is undying love for her after one or two amazing kisses. She supposed she couldn’t expect his feelings for Ladybug to vanish that quickly either. So maybe Nino wasn’t completely right but maybe he wasn’t completely wrong. Adrien cared for her and it was possible that what he felt could even be a form of love. And if she could make him understand that having him in her life, even if it was only platonic, was not an option but a necessity then it might not be too late to fix this mess and they could have their easy comradery back sooner than she had dared to hope.         

Anxiety turned her stomach even as her thoughts focused in determination. Hashing things out with Adrien wouldn’t be easy, not at all. But if she waited until she felt ready then it was never going to happen. Still, despite her uncertainty it felt good to have a plan. Taking a deep breath, she offered Nino a small smile. "You're right. Adrien needs to hear my side of this and I need to hear his too."

Nino, on the other hand, was looking far too satisfied with himself. "And then you guys can get back together so that my dudes are happy, yeah?"

"Uh… we'll see." Steering the conversation in a safer direction, she added, “Thanks for this. I didn’t realize how badly I needed someone to talk to. Alya is so lucky to have you."

"Well, you coulda had some of this..." Nino motioned to himself as he wagged his brows with a silly grin, instantly diffusing the tense atmosphere that had settled in.

Lips twitching, Mariette rolled her eyes. "Wow, I may have spoken too soon."

"But you're smiling.” He pulled out the finger guns. “My work here is done."

* * *

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A.N. – So, I’m not happy with this chapter but after scrapping it like five times and starting over I finally decided to roll with it. 
> 
> Thanks you all for the positive responses. The story is one big cliché but I’m glad you’re all enjoying it. I’m trying to get this finished before I start on a few new fics in the “Adulting” universe. 
> 
> Thanks for reading!


	5. In which Adrien has a visitor, Ladybug’s spots come off and the wrath of Plagg is a force to be reckoned with

It all started with a harmless text message.

Adrien wasn’t used to sharing the boy’s locker room with the boisterous track team, especially at half past seven in the evening, but their training had run late and as a result he wasn’t alone as he prepared to go home. Used to changing clothing and stripping down amidst strangers, Adrien didn’t pay any mind to his surroundings as he put on his Jagged Stone t-shirt and edgy ripped-knee jeans, carefully folding his fencing gear and returning the uniform to his locker. Doing one last check to make sure he had everything in his gym bag, along with Plagg and what remained of a bag of cheezits, he pulled out his new phone intending to message Nathalie about sending the car.

But Adrien paused when he saw the unread text message alert. He wasn’t expecting any messages; Nino and Alya both knew he would be in fencing practice until late and Nathalie would call if there was anything important to relay from his father. Curious he swiped the screen and froze when Marinette’s name appeared. His pulse jumped in excitement even as his stomach clenched with anxiety. Warily he opened the message.

Marinette: {Come by the bakery after practice}

Marinette wanted to see him…

Several emotions came to the forefront but the strongest was the surge of anger that caught Adrien off guard, and his ire only increased as snide thoughts began ranting around in his head.

So now, after pushing him away without even the common decency of an explanation, she expected him to jump at her bidding because she wanted to talk. But why tonight instead of yesterday when he’d shown up on her balcony? Or better yet, why not a week and a half ago when she first began ignoring him?

The fury became a flame that licked at Adrien’s heart as if it were dry kindling, the sharp sting of it twisting his lips into a fierce grimace as he realized that he wouldn't say no. He was so pathetic, so needy and desperate for any kind of affection that the minute she trapped him with those bottomless blue eyes of hers he would be unmanned, ready to turn himself inside out if that was what she demanded. And he hated that he could already see it happening, that he wanted to be as close to her as possible because he fucking missed her so damn much that he would promise her it was okay when in truth her abandonment was not only unfair but it had damn near broken him.

Marinette had abandoned him.

Just like his mother.

The flame of rage erupted into an inferno, his chest burning as a haze of red poisoned his perception. It was too strong to contain when made up of every depreciating thought and emotion that had been weaving through his head the entire week, all directed internally. It needed an outlet...

So caught up in his anger, Adrien almost didn't notice the icy voice that slithered menacingly through the cacophony of his mind.

_"Ah, so much anger but so much potential."_

Adrien froze, his muscles tensing in shock against the probing sensation in his head, a forcefully uncomfortable push and pull against his very thoughts. Not even daring to breathe, he frantically tried to process what was happening but he had a sinking feeling that he already knew and the purple glow at the periphery if his vision was only further proof that he was… was…  

"Hawk Moth?" he whispered with barely a breath as he choked out the words past his racing heart that suddenly felt lodged in his throat. Adrien kicked his duffle bag hard enough to gain Plagg’s attention and the little kwami poked his head out from his hiding spot, his neon eyes growing impossibly wider as he noticed the condition of his chosen. Adrien tried not to look directly at Plagg but it was a wasted effort when Hawk Moth's chilling laughter echoed in the teen's head.

_“Hello Chat Noir. I must say, I can hardly believe my luck. It’s so nice to finally chat with you."_

Silently, Adrien mouthed to Plagg, "Warn Ladybug..."

Clutching his cell phone in his sweaty grip, Adrien watched Plagg zip away, a black blur that was gone in seconds. His gaze darted around the locker room but no one was paying him any attention, the other boys talking amongst themselves. With his kwami gone, Adrien was on his own and the clammy chill of fear snaked down his spine and ghosted over his skin making him shiver, the chunky silver ring on his right hand his only comfort as he faced down his unseen enemy. "I'd ask what you want but I already know."

_"Then shall I propose a trade? The Cat and the Ladybug miraculouses in return for-"_

Adrien cut the villain off defiantly. "No. There is nothing you can give me that I would want."

 _"Are you so sure?"_ Hawk Moth's sneering voice taunted. _"I can feel how difficult all of this is for you. The great Chat Noir, savior of Paris and yet..."_ the disembodied voice took on a ruthless edge, _"you’re still the stray that no one wants."_

"Stop!" Adrien hissed softly, his panic blurring at the seams where his rage began to burn once more, stoked and prodded with every carefully played word from his nemesis.

_"I could make them want you; starting with that pretty little classmate of yours, then Ladybug and even your father. But love is so overrated, don't you think? Now fear... That is a powerful emotion. Fear could bind them to you far better than fickle notions of love."_

Adrien tried to take calm even breaths but his growing fury would not subside. "You're one sick fuck," he snapped.

_"Perhaps I am, but I'm also right. There's so much rage inside of you. If only you would let it out. I could help you focus it and together we would have all of Paris groveling at your feet."_

The pressure in his head intensified and Adrien cried out in pain as he fought to keep control of his own mind. "You said we could make a deal right?" he pleaded desperately, ignoring the curious looks he’d garnered from the other students, "You want our miraculouses. I'll get them for you but you have to leave the innocent bystanders out of this. The only thing I want is to get you out of my head."

 _"Interesting..."_ Hawk Moth replied contemplatively. _"You are strong to have resisted my control this long but only someone truly weak would turn down a chance at righteous vengeance. Get me the miraculouses and I will gladly leave you to your heartbreak."_

"Okay. We have a deal," Adrien agreed, sighing in relief as the invading presence pillaging his mind eased enough to no longer be painful. He stumbled from the locker room and slowly made his way to the rooftop fervently hoping that no one decided to follow him. He was winging this so badly but if he could contain the collateral damage as much as possible then maybe...

 _"Why are you not seeking out Ladybug?"_ Hawk Moth demanded sharply.

Collapsing in a shadowed corner, Adrien drew his knees to his chest, curling in on himself as much as possible as if that would keep the violent tempest seething within at bay. "Ladybug will find me. Just you watch.”

_"By sitting on a rooftop in the dark?"_

"Ladybug will come," Adrien asserted with more confidence than he actually felt.

_"You had better be right."_

 

* * *

 

 

"Tikki!"

The little red kwami jerked up from her nest of fabric scraps, alarmed as her other half phased through Marinette's bedroom wall. "Plagg! What are you doing here? Where is Chat Noir?"

"Akumatized!" the cat-like kwami wailed.

Tikki gasped in horror, "What!"

"He's akuma..." Marinette's stunned utterance trailed off as two sets of large eyes turned her way, one pair imploring blue and the other surprised green. The green eyes narrowed to slits.

"You! You're Ladybug..." Plagg spluttered jabbing a tiny paw at her rudely. "Oh well that's just fucking great," he hissed.

"Plagg..." Tikki warned.

"This is all her fault!" he yowled, sounding very much like an angry, wounded cat.

Guilt caused Marinette's stomach to twist unpleasantly but then it turned upside down as the enormity of what she was facing dawned on her. Not only was it her fault that Adrien was emotionally vulnerable but now she would have to fight him in order to save him. It wasn't the first time she'd had to face off against her partner but those times had been unexpected, she stayed in the moment and rolled with the punches with no time to really consider the situation. But this was completely different and Chat's kwami was right, she was entirely to blame.

It took everything in Marinette not to flinch away from the black kwami's baleful glare. "You're right, it is my fault. I'm so sorry..."

"Then fix it," he snarled waspishly, "because if you keep toying with his feelings you're going to get him killed. He's your partner not a fucking pet!"

Tikki flew between them taking Plagg by his paws and admonishing him gently, "Calm down. Being upset is not helping. Now where is Chat Noir?"

"He was at the school. I can sense him nearby so he's probably still there."

Tikki turned to her charge, concerned. "Are you ok, Marinette? You’ll be of no use to Chat Noir if you are just as upset as he is."

"Yeah," Plagg huffed, "we sure don't need you screwing things up even more."

Marinette gave both kwami a stiff nod. "I can do this." _I will do this._ "Tikki! Spots on!"

She felt marginally better as the pink light engulfed her, merging Tikki’s essence with her own.

Plagg flew to the window with a sharp, "Follow me.”

In record time Ladybug landed on the roof of the Collège Françoise Dupont, her eyes scanning the shadows in the late evening light searching for any kind of movement that might give away her partner's position. She nearly jumped right out of her spots as Adrien seemed to materialize out from the shadows, his handsome face set in cruel lines behind the purple papillion glowing around his eyes.

"Ladybug! So kind of you to grace us with your presence," the teen scoffed.

A fissure started within Ladybug's heart at seeing the sweetest boy she'd ever met twisted into the menacing stranger standing before her. It wasn't right.

_Your fault..._

Plagg perched on her shoulder, his voice pitched low. "You got a plan, Bugsy?"

"No. You?"

"Maybe if I transform him-"

"Adrien don't!" Ladybug cried as her partner ripped the silver ring off his finger, forcing the cat kwami to return into his miraculous. In Adrien's palm rested the unassuming black ring with a green paw print, glinting in the meager light before he closed his fist. Then purple light sizzled up his body and in Adrien s place stood...

"Chat?" Ladybug asked hesitantly. She gasped, taking a step back when his eyes opened but instead of electric green they were bloody red.

"Chat Noir is unavailable at the moment. Can I take a message?" The snarky reply could have been familiar but the long fangs indenting his lips as he spoke in a guttural tone sent a shiver down her spine.

It was then that Ladybug began to notice all of the differences; his suit was no longer jet black but grey with darker, jagged stripes along his torso, his belted tail was now studded with wickedly sharp looking spikes as was the collar of his suit and there was no longer a flirty golden bell at his throat.

This wasn't her Chaton, that much was painfully obvious.

Keeping her focus trained on his fist holding the cat miraculous she took a wary step forward. "Who are you?"

"I am The Stray. Fitting don't you think? It's what you've always thought after all."

It was true, she realized shamefully. She had jokingly called him that on many occasions but she had never expected that he would take her teasing to heart.

"Chat this isn't you. Please, you can fight this. I know you can," she pleaded, but he continued as if she hadn’t spoken at all.

“You know, I can see why you never cared about him. He was so nice and good and... predictable. And stupid, can't forget that one. But it’s all right, those flaws have been corrected. I'm smarter...”

The Stray stalked forward, brandishing metallic claws that appeared to be as sharp as any blade Ladybug had ever seen. She swallowed hard.

“And stronger,” he took another predatory step.

Ladybug loosened her shoulders balled up her fists, bracing for impact.

“And a whole lot meaner.” He lunged and the game was on.

The Stray pressed forward with unrestricted aggression, swiping his clawed hand and forcing Ladybug to maintain her defensive position as he moved with such increased speed that she was barely keeping just beyond the reach of his deadly attack.

"You'll need more than luck to defeat me," he taunted as his claws slashed within mere centimeters of her face.

Ladybug knew he was right.

They were evenly matched, counterbalancing each other as adversaries just as naturally as when they were partners, but Ladybug couldn't stop herself from holding back. Her heart may have been racing from adrenaline but her stomach was still sick with regret. With every block she willed herself to step up and knock him back but the mantra of 'my fault' kept running through her head and she couldn't stand to cause him more pain. So she held her ground without making any progress.

Until Ladybug miss-stepped, her foot slipping on the uneven rooftop and giving The Stray a clear opening. There was no time to steady her footing before he threw himself against her midsection shoulder first, forcing the air from her lungs as they hit the roof and rolled gracelessly in a tangle of flailing limbs. When the world finally stopped spinning Ladybug found herself pinned down, her wrists pulled above her head as the twisted version of the boy she loved hissed down at her with bared fangs and terrible eyes. His razor sharp claws pressed painfully into her flesh, her spotted suit the only thing keeping them from flaying her wrists wide open.

"No!" he snarled as she wheezed for air, purple papillion appearing around his eyes, "fucking shut up already!" The Stray was talking to Hawk Moth she realized just as his left hand shifted slightly to cover hers. Feeling the press of his ring against her palm, her eyes flew to his searchingly. "What do you say we quit fucking around and finish this already," he smirked but with a malicious edge that left her longing for Chat's teasing grin.

Ladybug didn't need to be told twice; she wanted Chat Noir back, she wanted Adrien safe and to achieve that she needed to kick some akuma ass.

Swiftly she brought her feet up, planting them firmly against his stomach and kicked as hard as she could. The Stray went flying back buying her enough time to throw her yo-yo into the air. "Lucky Charm!"

From the air fell a spray bottle filled with water.

The plan lit up in red and black spots and Ladybug discovered the Akumatized object was the cell phone tucked into the open chest pocket of The Stray's suit. Okay... she could work with that.

In a flash of grey The Stray was back on his feet and charging but this time Ladybug was ready. She spritzed the water right into his ruby eyes, blinding him momentarily as she used his momentum to snatch the phone from his pocket and shove him to the side all in one fluid motion. With a victorious cry she stomped on the expensive phone, getting a little too much satisfaction from the sound of it shattering beneath her foot.

It only took a swing of her yo-yo and a tiny swirl of ladybugs to repair the damaged phone before the roof fell silent as nothing if had happened. But one look at the boy hugging his knees with his face buried in his arms told her that too much had happened, maybe more damage than could ever be repaired.

"Adrien?" He didn't move so she went to his side, sitting on her heels as she ran her fingers soothingly through his soft golden hair. His only response was to lean a little closer. "It's okay. It's over now," she promised.

 "Did I hurt you?" he asked hesitantly, the question muffled against his sleeve as he refused to look at her.

Her miraculous beeped.

"No." A green eye peeked out from the crook of his folded arms and she tried for a reassuring smile. "I swear I'm fine." When he finally lifted his head she held out the black ring resting in her open palm. "Here... this belongs to you."

Adrien paled, tears welling up in his widened eyes as he reluctantly accepted the ring. "I'm not sure I deserve it anymore..."

“Let your kwami be the judge of that,” she replied firmly.

Adrien’s hands shook as he slid the ring back onto his finger and then flinched when Plagg flew from the silver band and right into his face. “Kid!” he cried, holding Adrien’s face between his paws, “You fought Hawk Moth's mind control. You played that sucker like a pro. I'm so proud of you!”

Despite the tears spilled, Adrien’s smile was blinding as he took the purring kwami in his hands and cuddled him to his cheek. “Thanks Plagg. I know I messed up but-”

“Nope, this was all her,” he replied waving a paw in Ladybug’s direction, lifting his head as an afterthought to glare at her, “and she better fix it.”

In her ear was another beep from her miraculous.

It was difficult not to shift uncomfortably when Adrien turned his curious gaze her way, a sheepish smile curving his soft mouth. “You’re taking all of this rather well. I always thought you would be super pissed off if you found out who I was under the mask.”

“Yeah,” Plagg piped up, “you don’t look surprised at all.”

“I’m just glad you’re okay, Adrien,” she breathed, unsure how to reply. They needed to cut this short before her miraculous ticked down any further…

As if Plagg could read her thoughts he smirked warningly, “You had better tell him, Bugsy.”

Fuck! This was not part of the plan. Yes, she had apologizing to do and Adrien deserved some answers but this… revealing herself… she was not ready for this.  She couldn’t… No no no no… Not tonight, maybe not ever… No, she didn’t want to and it wasn’t fair… and… and…

“Tonight might not be the best time,” she reasoned, panicking.

Plagg just shrugged. “He needs to know. Either you tell him or I will.”

“What are you two going on about?” Adrien interjected, visibly confused.

Again, her miraculous beeped.

Ladybug was a clever girl, no one could deny that, so even she knew that having Adrien find out her identity from his kwami would be a thousand times worse than if she sucked it up and told him herself. But it didn’t mean she had to like it, or want to do it, or… or that she would ever forgive that little black ball of evil for forcing her hand…

Glaring daggers at Plagg, Ladybug did the unthinkable. “Tikki! Spots off!”  
  
Adrien gasped and Marinette's heart did a summersault then sank like a brick straight to her toes. It had taken her quota of courage and then some to drop her transformation so she focused on Plagg and grit her teeth when the cheeky little bastard winked at her.  
  
"Marinette?" Adrien voice was so quiet, so uncertain that she had to know what he was thinking but she wasn't prepared for his stricken expression as he rubbed the back of his neck, clearly distraught.  
  
"I'm sorry... I'm so so so sorry," but whether she was apologizing for the past week or for being a total let down under the mask she wasn't certain.  
  
"This is really happening," he laughed sounding as if he were about to cry.   
  
Telling Adrien was a bad idea. It had always been a bad idea and this was quickly becoming the worst case senario of reactions that she had always dreaded. Maybe if she calmed him down... "I never meant for you to find out like this," _more like I never wanted you to find out at all_ , "and I have a lot of explaining to do-"  
  
"That's right," Plagg agreed, "and you can start by explaining why you tossed Adrien aside like a piece of garbage."  
  
"Plagg!"   
  
Ever the responsible kwami, Tikki flew forward giving Adrien a polite wave before grasping Plagg by the tail and pulling him away. "Come on. They need to talk by themselves," she sighed, shaking her head at her other half.  
  
Once Marinette was left alone with Adrien the silence became down right suffocating.  
  
"Marinette... I wanted it to be you." Her head snapped up and Adrien smiled weakly. "I noticed similarities between you and Ladybug but I could never be certain. I told myself it was wishful thinking but it didn't stop me from hoping," he admitted shyly.  
  
_Why are you so perfect?_  
  
Adrien chuckled awkwardly and Marinette flushed realizing she'd spoken the thought aloud.  
  
"Obviously I'm not. Not even close. You should know, you haven't wanted me around lately."  
  
She hated that her actions had made him feel unwanted when that was the farthest thing from the truth. "The malfunction was me, not you."   
  
"Bullshit!" he bristled.  
  
"It was because of Ladybug, okay. You and Chat, you both love her and I'm not sure I can live up to that. Ladybug... she's everything I wish I could be, like all the time, but Marinette is awkward and inadequate and when I look in the mirror that's all I see," she admitted, willing away the tears that stung her eyes.  
  
Adrien's tone turned sad as he discerned her reasoning. "If that's how you felt then why didn't you just tell me? Why did you completely push me away?"  
  
"Because I thought," it sounded quite ridiculous now, "I thought it would be better this way."  
  
"So you made that choice for both of us?" Only Adrien wasn't asking, he was berating her.  
  
Marinette pouted. "I know and I'm sorry. It just felt like I was lying to you about who I really am."  
  
"You are Ladybug. You're the same person in all the ways that matter." Adrien was so earnest that she almost believed him, especially when he leaned closer to cradle her face in hands, his thumbs stroking the apple of her cheeks. "I love you, Marinette. So much that it hurts to breathe because I miss you all the damn time. This has been hell and if you would have just talked to me I would have told you a week ago the same thing I'm telling you now."  
  
There was no denying the waterworks this time because how could Marinette stay cool and composed when Adrien was baring his heart and touching her as if she was the most precious thing in his world?   
  
"I freaked out when I realized you were Chat Noir I didn't know how to deal-"  
  
"Wait! You knew before tonight that I'm Chat Noir?" In the dim lighting she could have sworn Adrien's fair skin paled as his face fell. "So that's what started all of this. And if not for Hawk Moth I still wouldn't know that you are Ladybug. Were you ever going to tell me?"  
  
Marinette's gaze dropped guiltily.  
  
"I didn't think so," he muttered and started to pull away but Marinette stopped his retreat by clutching at his wrists.   
  
"I don't trust myself to be enough."  
  
"And I'm telling you that you are. But you don't believe me because you don't trust me." Before Marinette could protest Adrien freed his left hand from her grip and placed a finger against her lips. "You trust me with your life but that doesn't mean much when we both know you can take care of yourself. You don't trust me with your heart. You never did. And trust the most important thing in any relationship."  
  
"I... I..." She wanted to deny it, she truly did, but the raw ache in her chest was proof that he was right. Her vision blurred as a sob ripped from her throat.  
  
"You've got me Marinette, I'm all yours. But I can't be in this deep by myself. Either you're in this with me, with everything you've got or..." Adrien's voice cracked and she thought he might be shedding a few years of his own. "Or it's all been for nothing."  
  
No, no that sounded so final.  
  
"Adrien..." Marinette clutched at his shirt, panic engulfing her at the possibility that this was the end of everything between them, that because of her fear she may have destroyed the very thing she was trying to salvage.  
  
Adrien leaned closer once more and she felt his lips press to her brow and then he was gone from her desperate grasp, a brisk, "Plagg, claws out!" before he disappeared into the night.  
  
For a good five minutes Marinette could barely breathe through the anguished sobs that shook her entire body. Tikki stroked her hair and patted her shoulder but there was nothing her kwami could do to ease the way her heart was breaking all over again. And the salt in the wound was that she'd done it to herself.  
  
When her tears slowed enough for her to draw a breath, she echoed the most prominent thought in her mind. "Tikki, what have I done?"  
  
The red kwami sighed, her eyes sympathetic and her voice soothing. "Nothing that won't be set to rights in due time, Marinette." Patting her chosen's cheek she offered, "For now, let’s go home."

 

* * *

 

  
  
Being akumatized took a lot out of a person, Adrien now knew that with firsthand experience.  
  
Finding out the extraordinary girl he thought was out of his reach and the vivacious girl that he had become his anchor were the same person, well... that was an altogether different game of hardball and it left him emotionally sore and completely mind-fucked.  
  
It was safe to say Adrien had functioned on auto pilot those first two days; pretending to be sick the entire weekend in order to hole himself up in his room to do homework, play video games and anything else that required his undivided focus. He itched to do something physical, like go for a long, exhausting, muscle tearing, bone jarring run but he could hardly bring himself to look at Plagg much less become Chat Noir.  
  
It wasn't just guilt that plagued Adrien; it was disappointment in himself for being so vulnerable that it allowed Hawk Moth to compromise him. Plagg repeatedly told him that he'd done well, that no other akuma had managed to spare innocent civilians and fend off major damage to the city while under the sociopath's influence. It proved that Adrien was strong and did indeed have the heart of a true hero.   
  
However, Adrien wasn't sure he agreed. Ladybug would never have allowed herself to become Hawk Moth's pawn. She was better than that, obviously. He was the weak link, always had been and it looked like he always would be.   
  
In trying to deal with his mixed emotions on taking up the black cat mantle one more, his thoughts inevitably turned to Ladybug- _no, Marinette_... and that was a cluster fuck of negativity that he wasn't ready unravel.   
  
Adrien had laid all his cards on the table and there was nothing left to say. When he'd touched Marinette- _no, Ladybug_... for what might very well be the last time in the moonlit darkness of the school's rooftop, the moment of reckoning was upon them. All of their secrets were exposed and yet the divide between them had never seemed more unbridgeable. If she couldn't entrust him with all of herself, flaws and all, after everything they had been through as partners and as friends... then he was done. He had to be; a one-sided relationship wasn't healthy or logical.  
  
There was no way Adrien was walking away from this mess unscathed and with no resolution in sight, he forced himself not to dwell on where he and Ladybug- _no, Marinette_... where headed when the choice was out of his hands. And that strategy worked until Monday morning rolled around. Adrien couldn't afford to miss another fencing practice, and by default a day of school, so he put on his best game face and entered the school with a confident stride and a photo worthy smile.   
  
Fake it until you make it; that was the best piece of advice his father had ever given.

Seeing Marinette- _right now she's not Ladybug, stop it_... had beat him to class caught Adrien by surprise. She was never early and when his gaze drifted over to the empty seat only to find it not empty like it should have been, his stride faltered and for a split second she was all he could see, her pretty face drawn and pale with dark circles under her wide eyes that had never looked more blue...

Adrien swallowed hard, biting back the greeting he wanted to give; worried the longing that filled him to the brim was spilling over for her to see. He refused to influence her decision on their future with his overbearing feelings. She had to meet him halfway because he had nothing left to give. Lowering his gaze, he dropped into his seat and willed himself to ignore the stare boring holes in the back of his head.

And that was how the week continued; with Marinette not exactly avoiding him per se but not seeking him out either, and when their gazes did meet it was brief and loaded with all that remained unresolved between them.

Late Thursday evening, lying in his bed after a grueling work out and bracing himself for an even longer training day on Friday where he would not be attending class at all in lieu of D’argencourt’s last minute practice regimen; Adrien occupied his overactive thoughts by texting Nino who was bored out of his mind while keeping Alya company as she babysat her younger siblings.

Nino: {Gotta give my girl props, she builds a damn good blanket fort.}

{A blanket fort?}

Nino: {Seriously? How do you not- nvm, I’m guessing your old man didn’t have time to do fun things with you when you were a kid?}

{Um… that would be no.}

Nino: {That’s so harsh bro.}

{Eh, I’m used to it. Did I tell you he’s flying out to New York Saturday morning?}

Nino: {He’s not even coming to the meet? What kind of douchery is that?}

{Is douchery even a word?}

Nino: {In my vocab it is. :p}

Nino: {Don’t worry, we got your back. Alya and I will be there to cheer you on.}

{You guys are the best. I mean that.}

Nino: {No sweat. Um, I do have a question though. Marinette would like to come too. Is that cool?}

For the first time in their conversation Adrien had to weigh his answer carefully. His first reaction was to say “Yes please,” but after a little more consideration he had to admit that it might not be the best idea. There had been a couple of times in class where he could have sworn Marinette had wanted to speak to him but every time she looked away and said nothing. He didn’t want to count on her attending the meet and get his hopes up only to be let down again. But if this was Marinette’s way of trying to make an effort to fix them, then maybe this could be the starting point he’d been praying for.   

{Yeah. It’s cool.}

Nino: {Feel free to tell me to shut the fuck up… Have you guys talked any?}

{She explained what’s going on. I don’t like it but she’s… working it out, I guess.}

Nino: {She was hesitant to ask about the meet, like she thought you might not want her there.}

{No, I want her to come. More than anything.}

Nino: {Well this is progress, right? Because Alya and I were seriously considering locking you two in a room until you guys worked it out.}

Just the thought made Adrien wince.

{That was definitely not a good idea.}

Nino: {Worked for Alya and me. Granted it was a cage at the Zoo and her dad was akumatized and I was being a total dork about Marinette… Anyhoo, my point is small spaces with no place to run can really help a relationship.}

{Oookaaay… out of context that would sound totally creepy. Just saying.}

Nino: {lol}

Nino: {Look on the bright side. Things can only get better from here on out.}

Later that night as Adrien settled under his covers with Plagg nestled in his hair; he turned Nino’s words over in his head one more time. His friend had a point, he and Marinette had hit rock bottom and either they would come out of this stronger than ever or they would end up partners and nothing more. From where they stood now, the only way to go was up. He just hoped with all his heart that Marinette would be there by his side because he was so tired of facing his demanding life alone.  

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A.N.- I originally had two more scenes planned for this chapter but it was running way longer than I anticipated so this fic will end up being 7 chapters instead of 6. That should make some of you happy.
> 
> So akumatized Chat Noir… I really tried to be original with this because there’s so many Chat Blanc fics out there that I didn’t want to make the story any more of a cliche than it already is. Hopefully I did the scene justice because that was the turning point of the fic. Also a few reviewers mentioned surprise that neither Adrien or Marinette had been akumatized despite all the drama going on and I was hoping I didn’t give the next step in the plot way. So I dare say the worst is over. From here on out it’s mostly going to be these crazy kids working it out.
> 
> Oh and for the sake if this fic Hawk Moth is not Gabriel Agreste. Just going to clear that up now. Also in the series Adrien does not fence competitively but for this story he does.
> 
> So until next time my lovelies, thanks for reading!


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